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How to tell family to back off and know their limit.
So I've been with the same guy now for about 2 years. We're happy together. The only problem is that my family hates him. He's never done anything to anyone, he's been nothing but polite and cordial. Their hate is based completely off his looks. They are all mad because they think I can do better. But I don't care what he looks like. How do I tell them to mind their own business, and come to me with their problems?
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hi...
the fact that you are willing to tell your family where to get off because you want to be with a guy that they do not approve of really shows that you love him. its great that appearance doesnt matter to you because the true beauty of a person is their heart, something you cant see.
i think you should sit them down and explain to them that looks does not matter to you and you are comfortable with him and that you are happy being with him. you should also tell them not to judge him because they dont know him the way you do and they should make the effort in giving him a chance. also you should tell them that if he is not good enough for you then that is your decision to make, and you will evenually realise it but its totally up to u!!!!!!!!!!!
ask them politly to please come to you whenever they a problem so that you being his girlfriend can discuss your problems in- order not to make him feel more uncomfortable then he already is...
try not be too rude to them...
gudluck.
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I agree with gr8fruit. For whatever reason your family is being very vain. If your boyfriend loves you, does nothing to hurt you, is able to hold a job that supports himself and can contribute to a family should you to marry or move in together, if not already doing so; then they should be happy for you.
I have told numerous people that have written to this website that looks are only skin deep. You have to get to know the real person. Beauty will attract someone but intellect, knowledge and human decency is what keeps a relationship a live. To many of the "Beautiful People" lack these qualities and this is why their relationships don't last as they rely solely on their looks.
Your parents should be proud of you for looking past that which is only shin deep and finding the solemate that resides within.
As to what to say to your parents; I would say to you, say nothing. They have already made up their minds. If you feel you have to say something you could say something along the lines as this: I know you don't care for ________ but I love him. He makes me happy, he makes me feel secure in myself and safe when I am with him. I don't know what the future holds for us as a couple but I want to follow this road wherever it takes me. You have two choices here; you can walk this road with me and get to know the real _____, or you can stand on the side of the road and be judgemental. Should you chose the later it is your loss for you are missing the opportunity of getting to know a really great person.
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Hi,
Your family is being very judgemental. Let them know that you should love a person for who they are and not by how they look or what they do. Obviously they don't know him well or just aren't taking the time to.
To get them to back off, tell them exactly what you wrote here: that they should mind their own business and come to you with their problems. As you said, if he has done nothing wrong to them or you, you should be allowed to be with him. Tell them you don't want better, because right now he is the best. I don't think your parents judged eachother when they got together. Let your family know that until he does something bad, you don't want to hear any arguments from them again. They shouldn't be upset that he is treating everyone well. Let them know you love him and as long as you do... they should too <3
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