|
Don't know if i was in love or not.
i was with a boy for a year, and then we broke up. we never told each other we were in love, knowing that's a huge step.
when we broke up, we admitted to it. he said he was in love with me & i said it back. we dont even talk anymore, but i know he was my first real love. i just dont know if i was IN love, you know?
is there a difference between your first real relationship, that person being your first love, but not being in love with them? when it came to him, being my longest relationship, i never felt this way about anybody else. i was only 15 at the time. i lost my virginity to him and although we're broken up i do not regret it because i know i loved him; he was my first love, i just dont know if i was in love.
im not sure what im asking. but any input would be nice.:)
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
you're right, there is a significant difference in having love for someone and actually being in love with them.
i was 15 when i lost my virginity to my first boyfriend. it hurt when we broke up because he was my first, but i know i wasn't IN love with him just because of that reason alone.
the only difference there should be between the person you're with, and your closest friend is the physical intimacy aspect. you know you're in love with the person if you consider them your best friend, but you're also attracted to them and have a physical relationship that goes beyond just the literal meaning of "physical". and it's not about how long the relationship lasted, or how much sex you had; it's about the mental-emotional connection you had with them. did they make you feel like a better person ? feel good about yourself ? were you completely comfortable being yourself around them ? when you think about your future, are they in it ? and ultimately, how do they make you feel ? would do anything you could to help them ?
there's alot more, but i'm sure you have a general idea of what i'm getting at by now.
that's all i really have to offer, i hope it helped somehow (:
]
Love is such a complicated emotion. I wish I could tell some magic way to tell if you were in love, but there isn't. I am in a similar situation as you and feelings are sooo complicated to figure out. Here is my advice: no one can tell you if it was love or not. Only your heart can tell you and give you the answers you are looking for. I hope that was clear to you :)
]
Ofcourse he was your first serious relationship. So you feel love for him for that already. Whatever you did inbetween that just added on to that. You may have not been in love with him, but I'm sure you really love him.
Lillian
]
You might never know.
Is there a difference between your first real relationship and being 'in love' with someone?
Maybe for you there will be. Maybe not.
Love is funny word, because unfortunately it means whatever the hell each individual person wants it to mean. The person who beats their child might honestly say they love that kid and how can we argue? We can say their actions are wrong! But how can we tell someone else that it's NOT love.
I'll say this about my early relationships:
The love and friendship I shared with my partners as a teen, pales in comparison with the depth and the love I could offer as I grew. As I knew myself better, I could love better.
I don't think they devalues the love I had when I was very young, but I do know the love I have now is richer, fuller and more truly 'love' then I was capable of then.
Maybe you'll discover something similar. Maybe it will be different. The best thing you can do is gently put these questions on a shelf in your mind and take them out and look at them from time to time. There's a lot to learn about love, and a lot of time to do in. Don't pressure yourself about the difference between love and in love. Someday you might have a good theory, but even if you never do, you'll go on loving and being in love without any problem.
]
More Questions: |