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Co-worker problems, please help before i punch her in the face!
've been at THIS job maybe 6 months.
I am a Marine professionally and a Caregiver in the cilivian world. This question relates to my caregiver job.
There's this older woman, Gilda, probably in her 50's, she & I rarely talk & even when I give her a report @ my shift-she acts like she's too busy to listen. There's a vibe about her, I do not like-so I keep it strictly business with her, other than "hi,good morning,ect."
Ever since I started working here, she has gone out of her way to make me appear that I don't know how to do my job.
She's constintly complaining to the assistant manager about nonsense.
Who then in turn "talks" aka accuses me of whatever outlandish bullshit she could think of that day.
(Whom by the way, the "AM" is one of her closest friends.
When they do come in-in the morning, they're either talking about one of the other co-workers or are too busy in their "bff world" to listen to the shift debriefing.)
I've been in the medical field almost 3 years, and tho that's not that long- I know what I'm doing and how to do my job effectively.
I'm the youngest one working there, I'm 24 and I think I've done pretty well with dealing with these types of people. I've been really nice & respectful to her and everyone else I work with, yet Gilda seems so set on finding something to nail me with.
Its getting so immature & ridiculous, its also starting to irritate me that the "AM" (assistant manager) just automatically sides with her or dosent even give me the benefit of the doubt when interrogating me.
Examples, I work in a group home working overnights-so we have to do EVERYTHING.
Anywho, one morning after I had gotten everyone up and dressed, did a shower and changed linen, there was a lot of laundry so I separated it into two piles & when I left there was clothes in both the washer & dryer. (Usually its only in the washer when I leave and I wrote it in the "communication book" that I left out for them to see it, bc sometimes I'm such in a rush to get out of there & get to class on time ill forget to tell them stuff so I write about occurances/info throughout the night. It wasn't done by 7am so I had no choice but to leave it in there.)
The next morning, Gilda makes this big long speach that I need to fold the laundry in the dryer.
I reminded her that it was in the communication book and that in fact I did tell her.
She just shook her head a remained silent. And the next day the "AM" had a talk with me & said when Gilda talked to me about it *I* was unresponsive and didn't seem to care.
Another example, we have an abusive, tyrant resident that I've had many, many issues with, nearly everyday.
One morning, she wAs flippin out about the house not having any cookies and apparently it was my fault. When I went into her room to make her roommates bed, she threw tissue boxes at me, kicked her walker, messed up her room, broke stuff, told me to get the hell out, ect... Again, I wrote it in the communication book and told Gilda that I couldn't make the beds in that room bc this resident was such and such blah, blah. She said ok and nodded her head like she understood.
That following Monday, bc this happened on a Friday, the "AM" "asks" if I remembered to make all the beds bc I had left two of them unmade Friday. I went to the communication book and my notes weren't there.
I tried to explain to him, but he didn't seem to care enough to listen to my side.
And of course that morning she didn't say anything to me.
Just resently, as in 5*14*2010 7am, Gilda asks if I have been changing a resident who is steadily declining and is refusing to help.
Now, I've written notes and talked to them in the morning (and so has the 3pm-11pm caregiver) that she's really hard to get up, yet its possible-easier with two, but possible with one none the less.
Gilda says when she goes to change her in the morning she's soaking wet.
Now, there is not a schedule for when someone urinates. Regardless being in this field or not, everyone who pees knows that its no gaurantee that just bc you take someone to the restroom dosent mean they're not gonna pee as soon as they get back to their room. I just looked @ her like, 'are you really that stupid.' While she accused with those eye brows and wide eyes, which nonetheless the AM was in the kitchen with us, he didn't say anything but you could tell he was listening.
She asked more stupid questions and gave out obvious facts, like 'she's not helping lift herself anymore' and she must be heavy and are you sure you're taking her. . Ect.
I told her what the first paragraph of this example says, and maintained an "non offended" face with good composure. Then as I left, I told them to check the cameras bc that's what they're there for.
As soon as I shut the door, I heard Gilda and the AM talking shit. And saying she dosent believe me, ect.
And the list goes on and on, did I empty the dishwasher? Did I clean the bathrooms, did I put cream on everyone, did I take the trash out, blah, blah, blah. All that is common sense.
NOTHING is ever a question, she asks me like she already knows, which really insults me, as a caregiver.
I know I'm doing my job and I know that people who are constintly complaining about others, are usually the ones trying to defer attention from themselves. Or whatever their intension. It only bothers me bc, like I said she's been there longer and she has really good relationships with the higher ups. And I need this job but am filling out other apps but til I find something else, I'm stuck.
Does anyone have any advise on how to deal with her better or shut her up at least???
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No matter what job you hold, There is always one person that will test your patience.
Ignoring a co-worker while respectively responding to them is probably the best way to handle the situation. As it is not your job to mingle and create a friendship, It is your job to do what you got to do and do it right. Try talking to the assistant manager there is a clear path between stating opinions and harassing another worker. If I were in your position when I get the chance I probably would pull her aside and calmly as possible explain to her that you don't appreciate her complaining and insulting you. Not showing a reaction will eventually show her that you have your head held high enough and you have the maturity to handle stressful situations. At 24, A job in the medical field is a big accomplishment nor do some people are going to hand the job to you lightly there is always a challenge no matter what job you work. You could also try to transfer elsewhere but remember it only makes her get what she is looking for.
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You can't shut her up. She is in good with the assistant manager, and you are the new girl. It sucks, but unfortunately that's how it is.
You shouldn't wait until something goes wrong to deal with this problem, because it appears it is ongoing. Don't go over Gilda's head just yet. Talk to her one day before or after work. Let her know in advance you want a word with her. If she ignores you, firmly say you feel you aren't being listened too, and you would like her full attention. Let her know you respect her as a worker, and understand she has been there longer and has more experience. However, you also know how to do your job, and you feel she doesn't trust you or your work. Tell her you feel you are being attacked, and you want to resolve the issue. Listen to her, let her talk. Allow her to explain her situation, and then you can explain yours. If this proves to be ineffective, then you should talk to the assistant manager.
Tell her the same thing you told Gilda. Don't bad mouth Gilda, and don't be whiny or accusative. Only explain that you feel unappreciated and like you are constantly being watched by the other workers. Once again, if this doesn't work talk to the next higher-up. And so on, and so forth.
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