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five year old mom abanonded her
my bfs little girl has been with us for the last month. her mother dropped her off one week and said she will see her when she can. the little girl says her mom doesnt love her, that she wont see her, and her mom rather hang out with her bf then her. what do i tell her, its all true but of course i am not saying it is. i tell her that her mom still loves her but what else can i say to make her feel better without getting her hopes up that she will see her again. cause right now she isnt going to for awhile
my bf is getting full custody because this is stupid her getting child support and not seeing her child at all.
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I would say it's best not to touch on the subject at all. Let your boyfriend handle that. It's honestly just not your place to get involved, especially if your boyfriend is in the process of getting full custody. More than likely there will be a hearing, and with the courts involved, anything negative you say to that child can be used against you (intended or not) in court.
Next time she says something about her mom, just say mommy's not here right now but while you are with us we are going to have a good time. Then change the subject and go do something fun with her.
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How can someone do that!why would you do that to a child :( your such a sweet person!thank you for being so good to her!
Its so hard because as time goes by shell only ask more questions.you tell her what you have to.Tell her that your sorry her mum isnt here and that her mum told you that she loves her very much.tell her that right now money isnt coming home because she is doing soemthing and if she asks when her mum will be back just say that you dont know.you cant keep covering up for the mum.id probably say some truth but make it sound as if it wasnt so bad.like tell her that the mum isnt going to come home at the moment because she has soemthing to do but told youn to tell her that she loves you and wants you to smile and be the little angel that you always are.either way.whatever you tell that poor little girl itll hurt because at the end of the day her mum isnt coming back any time soon
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Bless your heart. How horrible. Have you considered adopting her?
I really think it's best to be as honest as you can, without hurting her.
I would say something to the effect like, " your mommy loves you very much, but she is having a very hard time. Your mommy doesn't like herself much right now and is trying to figure out what she wants in life," which is true or she'd be with her child. Then give that little girl as much love and attention that is humanly possible. Love heals and your love along with some honesty will and a long way
But don't ever lie to a child! They know, in their intuitive little selves, what's up. Talk to her openly and honestly but in 5 year old terms. And by all means, get full custody! Mom
doesn't deserve it..
Please feel free to email me if you need further advice.
God bless you for your courage and selflessness and for loving her. She will in time acknowledge you as mommy!
One more thing, validate her feelings too! Let her know you'd feel the same way. That you don't blame her for thinking the way she does!
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