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going crazy living with my mother!
about a year ago i moved back in with my mom in her housing complex, she ended up getting into some legal trouble involving a dwi and drugs and now she is getting kicked out of her apartment because of it, she doesn't work a normal job and says that she can't because of "mental issues" she says that she is bipolar and who knows maybe she is but i think she uses things as an excuse to not change her life a lot. right now we live in a 1 bedroom apartment, i sleep in the living room which is also connected to the living room and she has this guy that she sees on and off again over all the time. When they wake up her boyfriend immediately comes out and sits on the couch right next to my futon and today i told her that i thought it was a little disrespectful since i don't have any privacy as it is for him to give her, her space by invading mine and she totally flipped her lid on me. I am 22 years old and every time i have ever lived with her it seems like i can be sacrificed in any way needed for her to still be comfortable so today I told her that if that is how its going to be then when the eviction is final that maybe we should go our own ways, the only thing is that I know she can't afford to live on her own and i dont know what she would do without me. I feel like a horrible person but if we moved in together she'd have to rely on me for a long time anyways. Am i being too selfish?
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no, you are not being selfish at all. Number 1 she is a grown women and needs to learn to take care of herself. It is not your responsibility to live with her because she cant afford to live alone. Number 2 if she did need you around that badly then she should treat you with a little more respect. It would be differrent if you were 16 years old. But your not. Your a 22 year old adult and therefore you have a right to be respected just like she would want to be respected. So do what it is that you need to do, without worrying about what she needs. You dont need to be a parent to your parent. Good luck!
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No, you're not being selfish by wanting to move out. However, you're maybe thinking about it for the wrong reasons.
You shouldn't be moving out because of lack of privacy. That would be selfish. Losing privacy is a small price to pay for helping out a family member in trouble.
However, your mom is being a leach at a time when she should be either helping you to get out on your own or encouraging you to do so. She should not be putting a drain on your finances.
Your mother is an adult. She will have to find her own way to make it. I have bipolar disorder and somehow manage to hold down jobs, go to school and pay the bills. She won't get treatment unless she has to, and you moving out might be the best thing for her.
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No i don't think your being selfish i agree with
you everyone needs privacy and in your situation it's tough to have that i think you should talk to
the person your mother is seeing since he's the one invading your space tell him that you think it's
disrespectful that he sits on the couch right next to your futon and say that you'd like it if he wouldn't do that anymore i imagine that being in the 1 bedroom apartment is small and there's not much room to move around speak up for yourself if you don't like what your mother's friend is doing then make it known to him & hopefully he'll get the hint & stop tell your mother that if you can sacrifice for her then she can certainly do the same for you(:
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