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confused about an ex,VERY confused
My boyfriend and i broke up less than 3 weeks ago.He was my first bf,and i was his first REAL gf.We were great,had so much fun all the time and he randomly broke up with me because he was "getting sick of me","wanted to be free in highschool",etc.etc.but said he wanted to stay friends.We've basically been talking again,hanging out (less than we used to) and trying to be "friends". When we hungout yesterday, we were a little drunk and he came out to me and said he likes me still and thinks about me all the time and swore that im the most amazing girl ever,but he wants to experiment with other girls and crap..which ofcourse made me mad.He kissed me and all that and held my hand ,made sure i didnt get wet out in the rain,etc.etc. but ofcourse he was kind of "drunk". We made plans to hangout today too,and ofcourse he was sober this time.We got up early and me and him just went on a cute little adventure and went to all these places.He wanted to show me his old town so we visited there and he took me to this beach he used to go to and we chilled and ate and all that.And we had to sneak into one part of the beach and he held my hand and said "lets pretend like we're a couple so we don't get caught" blah blah but after a few seconds he stopped.Then we went back to my house and watched a movie,but didn't cuddle or kiss or anything..but still had a good time.I am trying to not talk about our relationship when im with him and just be happy and have fun and just see how things go.I didn't think he'd hangout with me all day today alone if he didn't like me...and same with yesterday and i felt as though the alcohol brought out his "true " feelings (as sad as that sounds).I just like him so much and I don't know how often i should hangout with him,or what i should and shouldn't say when im with him..or what!? help!
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I would advise you to move on, but I will tell you that you are right. He does like you. Enough that he can't quite let you go on his own. This type of thing will be a pattern with him. He will breakup, want you back, break up.... He probably I'd just not mature enough to be in a real relationship.
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I know it may sound harsh, but you need to ditch him. He wants you and he doesn't. He wants you to hang out with, but he doesn't want the responsibility of a relationship. Sure, it will be good to hangout with him since you still like him, but in the long run you are going to get hurt. If I were you I would cut off all contact with him, you will feel better about it and you won't feel lead on. Plus, if you tell him you don't want to be friends he may realise how he really feels about you. If he doesn't come back to you after that - he wasn't worth it to begin with.
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Hiya,
You need to listen to my words: FORGET ABOUT HIM. This guy broke up with you because got sick of you. and wanted to be free. If a guy told me that he was sick of me, I would drop him like a hotcake. Why are you even spending time with this guy? Being friends with him is one thing. Going on "cute little adventures"is another. Sounds like this guy wants the best of both worlds. He doesn't like you enough to actually get serious with you, because he wants to be free. And yet he's willing to kiss you and I'd bet money that if you bring that up later he'll blame that on the alcohol. Don't waste your time.
If alcohol is the only thing that will bring out his true feelings that's a BIG problem. I think it's okay to be friends with him but don't start dedicating all of your time to him. Because he's going to start getting the impression that you are only we he wants you and will take advantage of that. (which to me is what he sounds like he's doing already.) Make yourself busy. And don't tell him you like him unless he's willing to date you. I think he said best what he's really thinking "Let's pretend like we're a couple"
He wants to have all the perks but still play the field. You can seriously do better.
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For someone who told you that he was getting sick of you, It sure sounds like he still likes you. I would ask him flat out what he wants, It's nice you two had a great time but don't let him lead you on either or get your hopes up. If he wants to be your friend then their should be boundaries such no holding hands, cuddling, kissing etc. "Friends" do not do that type of stuff unless it's a friends with benefits type of thing but even then there really is no different than being a relationship. If I were in your shoes, I might be slightly annoyed with the fact that I was told one thing and then it seems like another, I would confront him because I don't know about you but I certainly do not like being lead on. Ask him exactly what his motives are, What he wants out of you. Don't let him play your feelings
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I think you should sit him down and talk to him about both of you and what your relationship status is but if you dont want to then just hang out with him once or twice a week and just talk to him about things you both like or things he likes and just be friendly and do things together that both of you will enjoy and who knows maybe he might want to get back together. Good luck :D
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