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Okay, so I know this does sound really mean, but I cannot stand my boyfriends sister. I've been with him for a year now. I'm 16, he's 17 and his sister is 10. I can't even explain what it is about her that winds me up so much. We actually had a good relationship to start with, and we did get on really well. She was brought up to be polite and nice and that but, up until a few months ago she's just been so needy and clingy and sucking upto my boyf soo much than she used to. Like, the other day was a snow day at school so we weren't in, so I went round his house during the day, but I wasn't feeling well, and he knew this. But, I only had about an hour and a half with him that day and we played xbox for about half an hour, then his sister insisted on him going out in the garden with her. He did ask me but, obviously I wasn't feeling well so I really didn't want too. But he still went outside with her knowing I only had a little longer left there! Now, I did think this through and to begin with I thought I was being selfish, but after a while I realised that he could of done that any other time! He can't exactly see me alot, yet he lives with his sister?? :/. The thing is, it isn't my boyf, she's always the one asking to do something with him when I'm there. I don't exactly see him that much during the week, 2 days at the maxium and thats from about 4 til 6 or 7pm maybe.
Sorry, abit off track there. So anyway, recently she's been like slyly insulting me. Like, when just me and my boyf were playing xbox (like split screen, top and bottom) and she knew damn well that he was top screen and she said "oh whoever's top screen is so good" then looked at me and said "no offence". And whenever me and my boyf just want to spend time together she always interferes. For example, we were watching a film in his room and about 5 mins after it finished we were quite tired and she came into his room and said can we watch this film in here. I know it was wrong but I was being annoying throughout the film, but it actually gave her no right to tell me to "shut up".
I feel so bad for disliking her this much, I mean she is only 10 and my boyf loves her, obviously, and I know it'd be different if it was my little sister. I do try to get along with her but she just throws it back in my face (quite literally the other day, me her and my boyf were having a snowball fight, me and her against my boyf although she kept on throwing snowballs at me....??). Tbh, I'm just fed up of it. Not just her, but me not liking her.
I can't tell my boyf about all this though, it would cause extreme awkwardness whenever I'm at his house and I just really don't know how to explain this to him without sounding selfish and like I only want him to spend time with me. Because it's really not like that, I just want to see more of him without his sister there.
I guess this is more of a rant than a question, but I really don't know what to do :/
Help!?!?
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She's 10 years old...of course she's going to be annoying! I bet someone thought I was annoying at 10 years old...its the age where you want to hang out with the big kids and be "cool". I'm sure she's not purposely insulting, I'm sure she is just trying to fit in...maybe find an excuse to hang out with you guys. And second thats her brother...and her blood...whether or not they live together 'blood is thicker than water'. You need to accept the fact that, that is his sister its not going to change family is always number one in this case. Now I can see you want alone time with him but you need to talk to him. Thats the only way you're going to get it, is if you talk to him and let him know whats going on. Or if you can't talk to him suggest hanging out at your house so you don't have to be near his sister and then therefore you will have your alone time!
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well see i meet my husband through his younger sister which is a year older than me. We were like best friends and now we don't get along or anything. my husband doesn't get along with her either. I know she annoys you but you have to deal with it. if you love your boyfriend youll find away. and making time for you and your boyfriend such as going to the movies or out to dinner or the park. etc. and invite her to go to the park with the three of you. she probably relizes you two have been together for a long time and is worried youll take her big brother.
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Well, she's 10. She's immature, and maybe jealous because that's the age where you start feeling... i guess you can say "insecure" about youself. Some kids at that age can be really mean (mainly annoying, trust me) and try to seem "cool" by insulting older people. Once she matures a little (assuming you're still with him) she will definately calm down. I hope this helps you :) good luck with her.
ps. can't you two hang out somewhere else? Like at a mall or something? (without her)
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If you aren't willing to talk to your boyfriend about this, then there is really nothing you can do but rant.
It's tough for siblings, especially when they are much younger, to understand what a 'relationship' is. If you don't step up a bit and say tell your boyfriend that you are getting a bit annoyed with her constant presence and feel like she doesn't like you... while then you are shit out of luck.
Because there is nothing you can do to change her behaviour. As you’ve noted: It doesn’t even really need to change. She is ten after all, she is going to be selfish and attention grabbing to an extent, and your are in her home and she’s going be around. Your boyfriend is the one who has to navigate through this and make sure that everyone’s needs (yours, hers AND HIS) are being met as best as possible. He can’t do that if you don’t speak up about needing more time alone with him, and he is unlikely to help his little sister learn boundaries if no one ever tells him he ought too.
The only other thing to do is to take charge and manufacture the alone time you want: Take a walk, go to a bookstore, see a movie, go to an arcade, get out of the space that is as much hers as it is your boyfriends.
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