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Should i go back to school this year?
I got taken out of school in the middle of school last year it is almost going to be a year since, and it will be the second semester of school. I got taken out; because there was too much was going on and I was getting in trouble I guess you can say. I drifted away from everyone; I don't talk to anyone from that school old friends anyone. I have been on my own just doing school all day. I believe it was right for me to leave school to I guess re create myself and find out who I really am. Well I have learned so much from being home schooled. Being home schooled has helped me with school and also having a different out look on life and right from wrong. Skipping to Halloween night this year. I was in my room with my mom just crying to her about things that were bothering me, I just was telling her that I can't stand being home schooled and I just want to go back, I have learned so much from this experience and I am ready to go back. I just want to be a normal teen girl living my life... Then I said to her now I want to go back to school so bad but I am so insecure with myself and I compare everyone to myself I just can't go back cause I’m fat and I hate myself. ect. I told her I would NOT want to go back to the school I was at before I left, because I said that everyone moved on with there life and they don't care about me, there going to talk about me ect. And I was just crying and crying... once I let that all out we just kind of talked and I stopped crying..... All of a sudden the door bell rings, my mom goes down stare and all I here is my name I got extremely nervous! They were screaming like oh my god I haven't seen her in for ever I miss her tell her to come down ect. my mom came up and I herd them cause they were screaming but she was telling me that I needed to go down maybe it's a good thing they came it was about 7 people... talk about pressure I hadn’t seen any of them in half a year, I told my mom no I didn't want to but in the back of my head I really did want to because I missed them but I didn't cause I was scared of what they would think of me. I went outside and it was so normal it was like I had never drifted from them and I wasn't different from them body wise. After they left me and my mom continued talking and she said wow was that GOD or what.
So I said you no maybe I should go back to school that I went to before... I have been thinking about it ever since that night and I just don't no my mind has been going back and forth like one day I will get really existed saying yea I should go back and think of all the positives then the next day ill think what the hell there is no way you can go back I’m too fat what if they don't like yada yada yada. My mom wants me to wait till high school, but I would want to go back this January. and she said she doesn't no if she would let me go back... but I wasn't worried about it because I didn't believe that I would really go back because I was scared... well last night we were on our way home from Hollywood studios.. and I told her how my mind just goes back and forth and I gave her all the details... she said well maybe you should just go back this year and ignore your negative thoughts something like that....
I don't understand I got my moms exseptince my old friends excepted me but it's still not good enough because of my stupid mind, I am so uncomfterable with my body and embarrassed with it I want to love who I am but I just can't. I am trying to make god number one in my life again cause I no once my relationship with him is good then everything will line up and I no that I just have to trust him but
I don’t know ugh and I have like 25 days or something in till January:( I don’t know what to do I need help should I take the chance and go or just wait in till I loose weight and love who I am??? Help!
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How great it was for you to see that what you were feeling was just 'figments of your imagination' as they say.
All too often, women moreso, beat ourselves up on the inside with all our insecurities. But low and behold, these people in your life were missing you all along and were concerned for your well-being.
I hope that you can now grow positively on the inside and face everyone else with a smile on your face, carrying the new positive thoughts, and be encouraged to face the day with a whole new ray of beautiful sunlight; as well as take on a whole new will-power to change your outer beauty to match your new inner beauty!!! :-D
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I agree with what your mother said about ignoring the negative thoughts your feeling try thinking postively thinking negatively will make the situation worst and you'll make yourself feel more upset everyone has things they don't like about themselves or they'd like to change it's normal to feel that way but try and accept your
body and who you are your in control of your life
if you don't like something change whatever you don't like until your satisfied if you don't feel
ready then don't go but if you do i say go for it it's mainly up to you what you'd like to do nobody
can make the decision for you only you can :)
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Divine...
that was long but understandable
you got to let go of your thoughts and worries
casue you can't tell your future and your sellign your self short. you believe in god that good so
let go and let god do his wonders on you let him tell you are beautyful cause later in time that the man you'll be seeing. so forget anyone who can't accept you know that god will. and you even told your self that but you don't have to know god to recevie a blessing you just have to believe and have everlasting faith....so go to skool this year if you want to but go with confident and god on your side...I want you to look at your self in the mirrior in say I love me and god made me cause im his child and he love me...say that everytime you wake up and lay down.
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your weight should have no impact on your decision of going back to school. personally, i would wait until the fall because it would be an easier adjustment and if your really concerned about your weight, then that will give you many months to get to your ideal body.
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