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My husband feels more like a brother
I have been with my husband for 12 years now. We've had some really great times but I've come to realize that he is more like a brother or a best friend to me. We aren't intimate much and we both seem to be satisfied with that. I don't feel any closeness between us that would indicate to me that our relationship was closer than brother/sister. I'm confused and am not sure what I should do? My feelings are strange and I'm beginning to worry about many things. I wonder if he still loves me and if he feels the same way about our relationship as I am beginning to. What do you think should go on? I don't have any idea on how to confront him about this situation. Should I consider divorce?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You should consider couples counseling. Sex lives die because you let them die. Thats the simple truth.
Is he satisfied? I doubt it. Very few men are satisfied with not getting laid and no intimacy. Maybe you married a block of wood, its possible, but highly unlikely. I'd say its more like you two don't talk about sensitive issues, which is definitely not like a best friend. More like a room mate you get along with well.
Confront him? You don't confront him. You don't submit a list of demands. You walk up with concerns. You tell him whats on your mind. You stutter if you have to, but you get it out. Write a letter to hand him to start things off if you really need to compose your thoughts, but get those thoughts in his mind asap.
Is your marriage beyond saving? Unless hes a block of wood with no sexual desire, probably not.
Also, consider investing in lingerie or toys. Bring a girl with you to Victoria's secret and try a few things on, see what gets the best effect. One of the hardest hurdles most couples who end up in your situation have is finding a way to rekindle that spark. Do you still want him sexually? If so, make it known. Put on something sexy, push him down on the couch, and seduce him.
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i dont think that divorce is your answer. after you have been with someone for so long they are supposed to become your best friend. think about it- people who can married because the sex is good usually end up divorcing months after the make their vows. so your husbabd being your best friend? probably not so bad. you have a committed man who you can confide in and whose always there for you. besides you can always try for a romantic evening or some kind of something to spice up your life (trying games or just something new or acting out a fantasy). you should confide in him though because he may not even be aware of what it is that you are feeling
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If you're feeling breathless and you want out, then consider it yah.
But I think you'll be more secure if you leave it this way. Not all marriages are based on intimacy.
Divorces are messy affairs.
Talk to him about it if it makes you feel better
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I don't know much about your situation or what happens at your home but after being married for so long it doesnt die its still there i mean you should be imtimate but like my mother and father in law are close with there arguments not to intimate or anything a few hugs sometimes but they love each other.
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