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Terrified of Driving
I'm 17/f and I don't even have my permit. Before you laugh and giggle in your computer chairs please understand that I would rather jump off of a building than drive a car. I've tried the whole empty parking lot, empty field, empty everything, but the second I start the car it's like I tense up. I hate it with a passion, but it's hard to watch my friends out and about with thier liscences (don't care if I spelled that wrong) and I'm still getting rides from my mom. I could have my own liscence right now if it weren't for the stupid panic attacks and the other people driving on the road. How do I get over this? Any one?
Thanks,
ScaredyCat
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Want to answer more questions in the Technology category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Cars?
There is no way to stop how other people on the road drive. But you need to remember that you're not controlling them or their vehicle. You're controlling you and your car.
I suggest that maybe you talk to a therapist about this. They can work with you on these types of things to help you figure out why you get tense, and other things. Once you see progress, I would try to get behind the wheel again.
I'll admit, I'm 18 and don't have my permit, or my license either and have to rely on my boyfriend to take me everywhere. I've had bad experiences with cars though, and then to drive where I live means you need ultra fast reflexes & a great attention span. (I have neither, and I live in Los Angeles).
Hopefully you can find a solution. I'd talk to your parents about it & see what they say, but I mostly recommend a possible therapist to talk to about those panic attacks.
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I went through the same thing when I first started driving let me tell you it's normal. Once you start driving and praticing you get used too it the tense will gradually go away as you become more comfortable behind the wheel. The number one thing that helped me is you need to "try" to be confident before you enter the car. Even if you need to sit for a minute take a breath check the mirrors etc. Don't worry, It's not a laughing matter I went through it too. It will fade as you become more comfortable with driving I promise!
-Bahaima22
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You just need to practice. I was terrified of driving when I first started out, too. But then, all my friends started driving and I started to feel more comfortable as time went on.
So, practice. Take it slow. Start out driving around your neighborhood, then gradually and slowly start driving on bigger streets.
Also, how do you feel about the radio? I know for me, it helped calm me down. If it helps, keep it on your favorite station, or make a CD of songs that will help calm you down. If it goes the other way and the radio makes you nervous (like it used to for my friend), then keep it off instead.
It's ok to be scared, driving is a new experience. Just work at it and you'll be a pro in no time :)
-Laura (17-f)
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Hey. I want you to know that this is a common feeling among teens. I am 21 now and driving every day BUT when I turned 16 and got my permit, I REFUSED to drive. My parents got a car and tried to force me to run errands for them. It became a real problem for them AND for me. heres what I did:
1. I turned the car on in the driveway. I just left it in park. I literally just sat in the car and got more comfortable sitting in it and getting familiar with all the functions. I stayed for hours and did this for several days. I got comfortable enough to remember where all the things were without looking, like turn signals, headlights, windsheild wipers, etc. It really helped me feel more comfortable being in the drivers seat. You have to feel like the other side of the car is a part of you and you have to realize that YOU control the car, it does NOT control you.
2. Once I was comfortable in the car, i still wasnt ready to drive for real, so i practiced putting the car in reverse, and backing up to the end of the driveway. I WOULDNT PULL OUT, i would just back up to the end of the driveway, then stop, put it in drive, and move back up to the front of the driveway. Repeat this until you are comfortable and can change from forward to reverse smoothly.
BABY steps are key for this type of fear. Driving can be scary, but it can also be liberating, and often times when you are stresses or angry, going for a drive can be relaxing.
OK after the driveway stuff,
4. I went to a formal driving school. Once I learned all the capabilities of a vehicle, learned all the road signs, and the laws, I fet much better about trying to drive. ALso, working with the driving proffessors can be very helpful. They act as another set of eyes to look out for your safety.
***driving school can be rather expensive and isnt an option for everyone. If you cant go, a great alternative would be to take a responsible adult whom you trust, and having them work with you. Make them quiz you on road signs and signals. It will be fun and help make you more comfortable. Knowing all the facts will also make you a SAFER driver. and that is def a good thing.
5. once you are ready, start out with small "missions" for yourself. If there is a house on your street that is close, or if there is a nearby parking lot or gas sation, make that your mission for the day. say "I AM going to drive to the parking lot today." take someone with you if you think that will help (but let me say this, having someone ELSE in the vehicle always made me more nervous so I always preferred to do it alone. ) Dont turn the radio on, it can be a distraction, but if you cant stand the silence, turn it on very quietly so its barely audible. THEN_ complete your mission. Back out of the driveway, keep your eyes open, stay alert, and only go as fast as you want to. If people shoot past you, they will get over it, dont let them bother you.dont go any faster than you want to. THEN, once you get to your destination, put the car in park and sit there and reflect on what you just accomplished. Think and rest for a minute, then make the reverse trip back home.
**start out with short distance missions, and then every week or day that you feel comfortable, go a little bit further.
ending advice: other drivers are being cautious too for the most part. Make sure once you start driving on the road with other that you always follow your signs, watch for other cars and pay attention to signals. You will be driving in no time!!! sorry for the long post, hope i helped you out! I would love to find out hw my advice helps you, email me if you need more advice, or SUPPORT! im here for ya girl!
stephanie.ellick@gmail.com
Stephanie 21/f/houston, tx
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I have my permit and I am 16/f. I've had it for a few months now, and I haven't driven since I got it.. I've driven maybe 2 times, and that was because my parents forced me because they say that I need to "get my liscense" BUT I HATE IT. Driving scares me 1/2 to death. I always feel liek Im gonna kill someone or gonna get killed myself by the stupid drivers out there today. But reality is, you don't want to be driven around for the rest of your life or paying for busrides. yuh know ?
So here's what I did, I told myself that I NEEDED to do this. You have to just not care that people may beep at you or try to pass you, go at your own pace and your own time and you'll be fine. Just the other day I broke down in the car because I didn't want to go on the road, but you really need to push yourself to the limit. and sometimes youve just got to.. drive. hahaa. If you don't go for it and face your fear, you'll never be as independednt as you want. Do you want freedom ? the key is driving. so go for it before you don't have the chance and regret not driving. You can do it, you just have to go headfirst and suck it up. That's what I did, and I still hate it, but once you get your liscense, it's your choice if you want to drive or not, just get your permit and then your liscense and choose what you want to do.
good luck ! hope I helped and if you need anything else or a little more encouragement, feel free to inbox me. try to have fun :] ! xxo.
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