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I'm paranoid & I always think I'm bothering people, it's holding me back
I'm really paranoid and it's causing me to waste a lot of my time and have many missed oppurtunities. I tend to apologzie for things a lot. Like if I'm being to loud in my cousins car I'll apologize. If I talk too much about the guy I like to my friends I apologize, (and I know that they really don't mind it, they've expressed that to me a lot). I'm always afraid that I'm bothering people. I suggest to some of my school friends that we hang out sometime and that I'll text them, and sometimes I wimp out because I'm scared that I'm bothering them. And I can't even talk to the guy I like outside of school or by text (I told him that I liked him about a month and a half ago, and it kinda freaked him out, and he never really clearly responded to it and things are still awkward but fortunately we're still friends. But the awkwardness makes me even more paranoid. Also, he's the type who won't talk much if he's not being talked to, and it can be slightly difficult to hold a conversation with hm if you have nothign to say, so that doesn't exactly help either). I'm too scared to even just say "Hey, what's up I'm so bored right now" or something like that. I'm just constantly scared that I'm a bother to people and that they're going to be like "wow she needs to leave me the hell alone" or something. I'm tired of not making plans with people and I still want to their to be some possibility that the guy I like will maybe start liking me back too, and I can't expect to accomplish that in only 3 periods a day in school, which will be over for the year soon. How do I get over this?
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hey ya.
im like that too. i apologize for everything that my friends go tired of it. even random acquaintances will stop me and say 'hey you say sorry too much'. i think it's a form of politeness but it has become a habit. lol i dont like making initiatives too, it sucks if you text someone and they dont reply and you're arggghh they dont like me, im bothering them, you're so afraid of the rejection... i understand.
h'ever i also admit that it's a matter of low self-confidence. start small. talk more to your closest friends. text them, 'bother' them. if you mean something to them, they will def respond. those who dont respond, well they dont matter. once you're used to it, then you can start with acquaintances etc etc.
i always remind myself that when im in a social gathering, the people i remember the most are the ones who initiated the conversation first and say hi. so i try hard to be that kind of person.
about that guy, well, just be yourself and stay normal. if he doesnt respond, then you dont hv to do anything. if he wants to talk to you, he will.
hope this helps :)
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Don't be afraid to at least try starting conversations, or sending people that first text message. If they reply or want to talk, then keep talking to them.
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well really you need more self confidence. just look at some things you friends do. they talk to people and note the response they get. hope you work it out. abiee x
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