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advice for a friend
my friend is going with a guy she doesnt like.so why is she going with him?? the day they went out they took a couples picture for the yearbook. she says she doesnt want to break up with him because of the piture they took. she said that all the other couples that took the picture had been going out for like a year.i think she just doesnt want to look back at the pict and think o yeah thats the boy i went with for only a month or so cuz i guess most of her relationships have been pretty long. i told her you shouldnt go with somebody that you dont like. but she still doesnt know what she should do. what would you tell her if you where in my position?
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I just think some people care about appearances. These people will always care about appearances, teen or adult. Now it could be true that she may be afraid of hurting him. That could be it. But, she may also just want to say that's my boyfriend so and so that I was with for so long. You just have to feel out your friend and her motivations. If all she cares about are appearances then the best thing to be concerned about is the person's feelings that she's with. If that person's emotions are getting destroyed in her game; then tell her to stop or tell that person what she's doing. But, your friend just sounds like either she cares about appearances or just doesn't want to hurt the person. You know best.
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I would say if you really don't like the
guy then put an end to it. Just staying
with someone because of a picture, or
because you've only dated a month is not
a good reason to stay together.
If he really likes her, its a little bit
cruel to lead him on thinking he has
a chance. Break up and save the guy
the pain getting more attached will
bring him.
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HOnestly I wouls say sometimes a picture is just a picture, it doesn't need to have meaning behind it.
And take it from experience, the longer you date someone b/c you feel like you should, or you feel sorry for them, the more they get hurt in the end. And that isn't right. So honestly it is just a picture. Maybe she is thinking maybe she will eventually get feelings for him or maybe shes afriad to break it off. If you help her understand why she is dating him, she will come to a better conclusion.
My advice, explain to her that the longer you wait to end it the more hurt he'll be. And you should never do something b/c you think you are supposed too, b/c that in fact leads to regret, believe me. I think if you just explain to her, that she is hurting him in the long run , and the yearbook is just a picture, maybe shell understand that it doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of life. My freshman year this couple who were the sweetest ppl I've like ever met, they looked so awesome together. well they dated a 2 years and a half and took a pic together for the yearbook then 2 months later broke up. My point, the picture doesn't last forever, its just a moment in time that freezes life for a millisecond and ends when the flash is over. She'll be fine, just be there for her, and help her understand the greater meaning, you can use my examples if you want.
Good luck, I hope things work out well :)
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