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Booty call?
Well, this guy and i have been messing around for about 3 years now. And hes 5 years older than me, but its become more intense. Like, now he wants me to sleep over and all that. But he has a girlfriend of two years, but he says he doesnt care about her. He basically just needs her for now because of work. Well, we are on the level of more than good friends and less than a couple, its confusing. I really have strong feelings about him, and i go over his house everynight and its not always about sex. I dont know if he is using me, and i really doubt it just because of how he acts towards me. I know he cares, but its like we cant be together right now because of our age difference and because i am 16. Am i a booty call? or is this all that can be at the moment? and until i become 18 this is all that can happen?
PLus, i stay over and we cuddle and all that.
idk, please any advice?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
He could be lying to you and saying he dosen't care about his girlfriend and he might be doing the same thing to her. If you guys aren't dating, he might not think he has to treat you like one. I would stop seeing him or if you don't want to do that, only be his friend. Hope this helps!
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hiiii :)
well i was in a similar situation.
i have a best friend, we've been friends for about four years now. he's a year and a half younger than me and to be honest it doesn't bother me one bit. we use to like each other awhile back but then he ended up getting a girlfriend and they've been going out for two and a half years now. it's honestly one of the hardest things i've had to deal with so far in my life. he still tries to get with me and i really really want to be with him too, but i had to say NO. i told him that i just can't because he has a girlfriend and that would just be wrong. he said that his girlfriend would never find out which was true but i still said, im sorry but i just cant let you do that, i know your better than that. as hard as it was for me to say no i knew that we were both better than that, and i had a sense that he was physically attracted to me, so he just wanted to get with me knowing that he could get away with it. right now i haven't talked to him for about a month because we're both so busy and he is always playing sports or with his girlfriend (one or the other) that now we barely get to spend time with each other which breaks my heart but i think it's best for me to keep my distance for awhile. we are still best friends, don't get me wrong but now that i told him i couldn't do anything with him while he has his girlfriend he doesn't try to pull anything on me anymore when we're together which helps ALOT. so in your situation i would say he is using you, and that you need to keep your distance for awhile. if you guys are good friends, tell him thats ALL you can ever be for as long as he has a girlfriend because your better than that, you better than being #2. find someone who loves you and only you! good luck sweetie, if you need anything else im always here! ♥ LU
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hiiiiiiiiii, whoa big thing is He has a girlfriend.
let me be honest my best guy friend is doing the same thing with this girl & she has a boyfriend of two years.
what HE should do is break it down to his girlfriend so you can have HIM to yourself & he wouldn't have to stress her as much -feel me?
but if you say he cares then he must right?
he could be telling you what you want to hear or he could just mean what he says I know any guy who wants a booty call doesn't cuddle so hey sounds real .[:
& you too can be together as long as you don't really tell your mom & dad about him as long as they don't care about the ages cause honestly I know alooooooooot of people who date that are 14 19 and all that .
do what makes YOU happy.
hope i helped_xoxo<3
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The age is an excuse, the girlfriend is an excuse, and his work is an excuse.
You can accept them as valid 'excuses' if you would like, but it doesn't change the fact that he is giving you only sporadic affection and a lot of excuses.
This isn’t a relationship. This IS a booty call. Booty calls can be ‘cuddle calls’, it’s not really any different. Most guys like cuddles, especially if they are already getting more from two different girls...
He probably does care for you.
You are probably a great girl and very deserving of his affection.
However, neither of those things make him a great guy, or even a decent one and neither of those things can make his behavior okay.
He's betraying his girlfriend of 2 years, constantly, and he’s been leading you on with excuses since you were 13? There is no two ways about it hun, that is pretty low behavior.
If he can fool her, for two years and treat her so shabbily, somehow I have difficulty believing that you aren't also being duped by a cheater and a user. No matter how awful she is, no girl deserves a boyfriend like that. Not her, and not you.
You are being used, at least this far: You are being used as the girl who will accept watching him treat another person with disrespect and deceit. Most people wouldn’t.
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He's using you as a booty call and telling you anything you want to hear...like that he doesn't care about his gf....he wants to be with her but wants to fuck you, he wants the best of both worlds like most guys his age...most players, don't fall for him! even though it sounds like you already have, just know that he is using you and you are going to end up getting hurt if u continue to think of it as more than what it is...maybe you should talk to another guy or something because you are not respecting yourself by letting him use you as a peice of ass...you shouldn't be ok with that, he's messing with your heart
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Well I will be totally honest, I don't think much of your relationship, and I have a hard time not feeling dislike towards your sort-of boyfriend.
First off, he has a girlfriend which he is blatantly using. He has done this with no remorse for two years. This should give you an indication of how he will deal with people whenever his interests conflict with what is morally right. Clearly, he has no problems with the whole concept of using another person for his own gain.
The whole notion of you not being together because of age sounds like the excuses married men make to have affairs. Dont get me wrong, its true that, when you were 13 (!!!!) and he was 18, that would have landed him in a world of trouble. But, at the same time, if he cared for you so much how come its not exclusive? A relationship can be secret and exclusive at the same time...
Whatever his justification for lying, cheating and disrespecting his current girlfriend is, I doubt that its not something he could have avoided in 2 years. And now I am actually playing along that it is somehow acceptable to use another human being in this way- which I categorically think it is NOT.
Let me tell you one other thing. Over the years I have had a lot of friends, mainly guys. I have been close to a number of them with extremely dubious ethics in regards to women.
Now, these guys were typically some of the most successful in that department as well, despite many (imo damn obvious) signals that the girls should have picked up on. Yet all of them made their women feel "so special", they all knew how to manipulate them emotionally to the point that they the warnings were right there- in plain sight. Yet they got away with it again and again.
I am not saying this is your boyfriend. But what I am saying is that my warning lights went on the minute I read through your description. There are times in life when logic and reason must "win" over one's desires and wishes. Are you sure you aren't seeing what you want to see? Why do you think that someone who can totally disregard another person's feelings, rights, and self respect (his girlfriend's) is actually a good person?
Thats all I can say to this. Do I, from this limited info, believe you are a booty call... oh yes. I have as little doubt as is possible from what I know.
I hope you work this out.
Good luck.
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