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Hes not a real guy
Ok so I have started to like this guy and we have been friends for a long time. We just realized that we have feelings for eachother and surprisingly its really not that awkward. The only thing that i am hesitant about is that hes not like a manly man and he doesnt ahve alot of guy friends. It kind of bothers me because I want him to be a man's man..thats what im attracted to. What shouldi do about this? should i tell him and whats your opinion?
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no i dont think he should change himself you should like him for who he is. and who cares what other people think of him and what not...... your have chemestry right??? so theres gotta be somthin there
loveboys
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if you started up feelings for him as the way he is now then why does he have to change. you can try and change him but only thing that is going to change is yours guys friendship.
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Either accept him the way he is, or find someone else to be attracted too.
I'm serious. You can try to change him all you like, but you can't actually change what he enjoys the company he finds plesant. It simply cannot be done.
You can talk to him about this if you want, but it wont do any good. It really wont. Telling someone to 'be more manly' isn't advice that is makes any sense. You can tell him which of his more masculine clothes you like or you can tell him what activities or hobbies of his you think are cool... but just telling him to be more manly is useless. He wont know what is expected of him, and even if he can figure out exactly what it is you want, he might not be able to deliver if it is not the person he wants to be.
Either accept him as another type of guy you can be attracted too, and apperciate the 'manily' bits of his personality or, if you can't do that, move on. Because if you are already looking to change a guy at this stage, you are doomed.
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Well, see telling him that you want him to be a "manly-man" would be wrong, because then your trying to make him change who he is for you. You should like people for who they are. If you don't like him not being a manly man, then don't go out with him, but i must say if that's the decision you make, you are going to be acting very very shallow. If you like him, then there has got to be something there that you like. You either decide to deal with the fact that he's not a manly man, or not.
Also, if you've ever noticed, the "manly" guys usually end up being jerks... They aren't really nice guys most of the time. The guys like him are the ones that are the best boyfriends. I'm telling you, he's gonna treat you right 10 times more often than a jock or "manly-man"
Hope that helps you, but in the end the decision is yours.
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Hi,
If you're attracted to a manly man, what is it about him that makes you want to go out with him? Have you thought about that? If this is really bothering you, I think that maybe you should reconsider dating him. After all this is who he is. You can't change people. Sooner or later he will begin to resent you for wanting to change him and you will resent him for not being the man you want him to be.
However, don't beat up on yourself about it, you have a right to like who you like. You can still be best friends with him. Maybe you just weren't meant to be a couple.
Sometimes we can be such good friends with someone and it feels so good, that we automatically think that a romantic relationship would work just as well. That is not always the case. Sometimes friendships are meant to stay just that. I hope I helped.
Good luck,
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