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lost.. & scared ill never find somone.
hay.. ok so im 17 and im still a virgin. i broke up with my bf last year after goin out with him for a couple of monthes cos he wanted to have sex and i wasnt ready and cos my friends didnt like him.
but now i think im ready and i really want to have sex but i want it to be the right time and right person. i think about gettin back with my x so we can do it but i now it wouldnt work.
im scared that ill never find someone and that ill be alone for the rest of my life. i think iv just lost hope. wat do i do?
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To be honest, your only 17, not every girl has sex, I don't believe sex before marriage, and the high risk of STD and HIV now its bad, make sure first if your going to do it, and if you want it to be right, romantic, and the right person i recommand wait.:) but thats just my opinion
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you're only 17!you're sooo young and you're rushing into something that's so big.just bc everyone else is having sex doesn't mean you have to and i dout you're truely ready. you have your whole life to have sex why rush and maybe make one of the biggest mistakes ever?you made the right choice by dumping your ex bc he wanted to sleep with you and you weren't ready to.besides it sounds like he was a jerk and never loved or respected you.if he did love or had the least bit of respect for you he wouldn't of pressured you to have sex and he wouldn't of put you in that situation.tust me when i say wait until you have a husband that loves and respects you for you not your body.you're going to be an adult soon so demand the guys in your life to respect and to treat you as if you are their whole world.women that got anywhere in life don't just do things bc someone wants them to or bc everyone else is doing it.they think for themself and that's what you have to do.think what's best for you not him or any other bot you go out with.
and you will find someone to be with,just look for the guy that respects you for you not your body.you have your whole life to find Mr.Perfect so don't think that he left without you,bc he's prob just waiting.waiting to find you.so wait for him and both of you will be fine.good luck and DON'T RUSH!!!!
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In my experience, actively looking for someone rarely nets you a good result. If it happens, it happens.
My advice to you is to put this out of your mind until it does happen. Enjoy life while you can, and when Mr. Right comes along and you're ready to have sex with him, you'll know. You're still young, so don't give up hope just yet.
If you don't know, you're not ready. It's that simple.
Also, I beseech you not to listen to anyone's advice over the internet (Myself included), as to if you should have sex/have an abortion/etc etc. Other people have a different set of values than you do, and see the world a different way. The only person who's opinion is relevant in these kinds of situations is yours.
If you feel you're ready to have sex, by all means, don't let any strangers over the internet stop you, but be absolutely honest with yourself, and be absolutely sure it's what YOU want.
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Well I'm glad you were not pressured into having sex with him. If you've stayed strong about it then when you made the decision to break up, don't let your guard down now by making it not worth the trip.
It isn't the end of the world quite yet so I would relax a little about finding the right person. That could take time and years. You should think about finding the right person to have sex with when you're sure about the person and you're established with both feet on the ground.
I would personally advise you to wait AT LEAST a year before having sex with someone. For the simple reason that you don't have to worry that the person will hook up with you and then you have sex and then what do you know, 3 months later he breaks up with you because that was a done deal. Not saying it wouldn't happen for sure but why would a guy wait for a year just to have sex with someone?
Having sex should mean a lot. It should be a way to show that you care and would do anything for that person. Yes sex maybe a desirable trait to have every once in a while [[I wouldn't know, I'm still a virgin and plan to STAY that way]]but really you should only think about it at an age when you know you can handle it. Then you won't be worried that the guy IS the right person and if he does love you.
I'm trying to tell you something that a lot of girls have regretted. Save it for someone special. EVEN if it means you have to wait 5 or 10 years. You wouldn't want to look back at your first time and know you did it with the wrong person and you did it just to do it would you?
And then there is the baby factor but I think that is self explanatory.
Just think about it. The LONGER you wait the more SPECIAL it will be.
I really hope you consider
-KD/f/15
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First of all, I applaud you in your decision to end a relationship that was moving too quickly for you. That can be a very hard thing to do.
Now that you feel ready to have sex, I would advise you to talk to someone who can help you if you have not already. Your mother, your doctor (anything you share with your doctor, minor or not, will be held in confidence) or you can visit a local planned parenthood. Arm yourself with knowledge of your body and how it works, about sexually transmitted diseases and about contraception. This is the only way to ensure your own health and safety. I hope that you're already on birth control. Do not rely on condoms alone to prevent pregnancy or even all types of sexually transmitted disease. Of course, once you begin having sex, make sure you visit a gynecologist regularly for an exam.
Do not give your body to anyone out of fear that you will never find someone who will love and care for you. Making the decision to have sex is an adult decision and for that reason, you must exercise mature caution and restraint.
You know in your heart that you would regret the decision to sleep with him. Trust in what your heart is telling you. Very rarely is it ever wrong.
You are only 17 with many, many years ahead of you. At your age, it is more common that you have not found the person for you. You need to grow and mature and develop the ability to stand on your own two feet confidently before you ever consider sharing your heart and your life with someone else.
We all feel this way at one time or another. It's perfectly natural as the fear of being alone is the greatest we have. Please try to concentrate on having fun with your friends and on continuing your education at this point in time.
Your self worth is not dependent upon having a boyfriend. Period. You will find someone who will love you. Remember that high school is so small in comparison to the world. The one for you may simply be waiting somewhere else. Through college, your career and your every day life you will meet many incredible people. Just take a deep breath and relax!
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You breathe.
You realize that people don't just get back together to sleep with someone because they're ready to lose something major with "that" person. You realize this isn't a reality show, it's real life and once you do something - it can never be undone.
You are seventeen, why are you looking for a soulmate now? You've still got all your 20's and maybe 30's to find a good match for you.
Who you're with should better you. They should better your life. They should challenge you and make you grow. Do you know how many people there are walking around on this planet? You're going to come across extraordinary people in your lifetime , but you can't worry that you'll be alone. With or without a partner, you'll never be alone because you'll have friends and family.
Worry less. Smile more.
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