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my best friend
15/f
ok well iv known my best friend for three years and since i met her i really like her alot and well i think i really like her like as in love that i want to be with her. i dont know wether i like girls or not caz i think im straight but not sure caz of my best friend but i dont know wether to tell her i might love her or not caz i dont want to lose her as a friend
should i tell her i love her and would like to be with her even tho shes not bi? can u help
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
It's kind of common for girls this age to wonder about their sexuality, and it often happens that they wonder if they could have 'feelings' for their best friend. It's up to you to see if this is just a phase, or if you actually really have strong feelings for your best friend before you decide to do anything. While you might be 100% sure, how credible is that? Think about any past relationships or crushes you may have had, and think about how long they worked out and stuff. It's like with any other crush: Is it real? (To start to make your decision).
If you're not sure as to whether or not you like girls, let time take things somewhere. It might be a little awkward to tell her how you feel if you're not even really completely sure in the first place? If she's not bi, it might come off as a little weird..
Instead of telling her about how you're feeling first, kind of casually ask her how she feels about bisexuality, or lesbians. Just bring it into general conversation at some point. See how she responds, and if it dosen't seem to negative, maybe you can tell her how you feel eventually. If it seems more negative, it may not be the best idea to go professing your love just yet.
I get how you're worried that it might mess your friendship up, it happens to all of us (straight or not), and your situation is even more complicated. Just make sure you're REALLY sure about how you feel. Because you've known her so long, you could be mistaking this for a sisterly/friend kind of love. If you don't think that's the case, ask yourself some questions. Could you see you two holding hands? Kissing? Having a serious relationship? Is she interested in any guys at the moment?
If she seems kinda positive toward the bisexual thing, or seems to be dropping any hints, maybe grab her hand or something one day. Nothing too extremly bold, because that could be really weird for her if she's not interested..
It's really confusing, and I really hope things worked out and I've been able to help at all..
XOXO
KAT.
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well you might just be in a phase where your just bi-curious it hppens alot when your hormones start to act up and begin to change with maturity
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Well, you're just trying to figure things out. That's okay at our age.
What I would do is just think about this. Determine if this is an intense sisterly love, or something more.
If you come to find that you have strong feelings for her, then I suggest sitting down with her and telling her that you might be a lesbian or bisexual. I wouldn't bring up your feelings for her until this news has sunk in. Give her a little time before you tell her that you have a crush on her.
If she is truly your friend, then there is no reason for her to freak out if you decide to let her know. If she doesn't share your feelings, that's okay. She's still a great friend right? I know it might hurt a little, but just keep her there. You have a great friendship here, and if things don't turn out the way you wanted (ie she just wants to stay friends), that's fine. It won't be the end of the world, I promise.
Good luck! Let me know how things work out. I'm here if you need me.
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