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losing a girl
I have built up a lot of cofidence this past year.
Especially with school and relationships. My girlfriend has almost all this power from me and I have no idea why I let myself give it to her. she's incredible and extremely nurturing. Though she broke up with me for not even a day and then the whole time we were apart it seemed extremely wrong. I realized she was my best friend and my girlfriend.
She cried the whole time she left my house to her best friends. We saw each other that next day and talked the night of all of this. She said it was a mistake. We just had our 4 month and are extremely pleased with each other.
My only issue is..what if this all happens again because I use to be suicidal but now as I have grown it's been something different. When she was there I even broke down I tried holding it in for when she left. Sure, i am emotional but I try my best to make sure she knows it's alright. I am just so scared to lose it all. I think were fine as of now, but if I do end up in that situation again what are some ways I may be able to handle it?
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ok so loosing a girl isn't that hard. its going to happen most likely you can handle it out by yes crying and hanging with freinds and family a LOT! she shuldnt have so much control over you is what im thinking i hate when girls do that im sure i dont but w.e any way you have to know that its not the end of the world loosing her just think you had good memories and what not and thats it.
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I am SO proud of you for being able to admit and express your feelings so well!! I am also proud of you for being man enough to break down in front of her, it doesn't show weakness, it actually shows strength!
Should she break up with you again- understand that it's more important to deal with your mental first,to prevent suicidal or hurtful thoughts. You must realize that what goes up must come down. What has life, does die at some point. All good things do come to an end eventually, even if you married her later in life, life does end.
Ways of handling it should it happen again-
-taking time to write your feelings in a journal.
-taking time to think about different things you -have interest in doing and go for it.
-Getting more involved with sports or working out, walking or running.
-Meditating
-Not thinking of the hurt, but thinking about the lessons of love and understanding that love does hurt sometimes. It's rain, sunshine, pain, happiness, joy, sadness,and many more emotions all balled up into the mind.
- not communicating with her for a little while until you heal. You said you were best friends, which means you will still communicate off and on which causes more emotion and confusion too.
- tell her up front that she can't run in and out of your life and make sure that what she wants next time and if it is, then respect it.
- spending more time with family, friends
- joining social clubs or community events - use time wisely to help others if you can.
-volunteering at shelters, church, soup kitchens, something that makes you feel good about your self as you are helping others that need you and appreciate you as a person.
-go on chat sites to discuss your feelings and expereince with other people who are going through the same thing as a support group - they help a lot!!
- learn from it so you can use it as you grow more in your life and you can help someone who goes through it. "smile"
Don't worry about that right now, as it can consume your thoughts and play with your mental. right now focus on where you are, your happiness, and set goals for YOURSELF now so that you have something planned out to work on, while in the relationship, and even after the relationship should it happen,write those goals down and cross them out as you accomplish them.
Good luck dearest!
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Thats so sweet.
But even though it seems stupid right now, time eventually heals. When I lost my first love, I thought it was all over. Now, I'm practically engaged. So dont ever give up hope and dont let love slip too far from you. You'll find a great girl one day if it doesnt work out. As for the suicidal part, dont let depression bring you down. You're a strong person deep down. A lot of people are way stronger than they give them credit for. Just because you cry, or get mad easily or just very emotional, that doesnt mean your not strong (by the way, that was an assumption). In reality, I think those who cannot cry or dont have emotions are more weak than those that do. Because they are hardened over the cruel days of their lives, they cannot cry or show others that they truly care. And that is weakness.
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1. hang out with your guy friends
2. run/exercize-endorfins increase happiness and lower depression
3. listen to rock music-not alternative emotional stuff
4. watch a few comedies
if you want her back and you think that she will be willing to come back:
1. call her and talk
2. do something unique and special to win her back
3. tell her how much u care and let her decide
4. give her some time and dont let her see how much pain your in. giving yourself the upperhand will make her want you back again
5. after a few weeks give her a call and just see "how she is doing" and say that "sometimes i still think about us" and she wat she says
anyway, hopefully you guys will be fine though, if you really are both satisfied and have a healthy relationship everything should run smoothly.
if it does end eventually remember that everybody goes through breakups and it will get better, even if you dont believe me, time heals everything...
hope that you two are smitten :)
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