|
holding a conversation
I have problems holding conversations with people. I will be talking with someone and they ask me what I want to talk about and nothing pops into my mind..... im scared Im a dull person to talk to. How do people just come up with things to talk about? Im also very shy when Im talking to people face to face like I have problems looking at people in their eyes as well, any suggestions would be greatly apriciated! Thanks ahead of time!
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Well, first I want to help you with the eye contact.. Instead of looking at their yes, look at their fore heads or their nose. It will look like you are looking right into their eyes! Some conversation starters:
-The weather is nice today...
-Ask somebody about something that happened to them in the past that they told you. (If they talked about their cousin's B-Day party, ask how it went.)
-Ask the person if they think you are a dull person to talk to (you will find out the truth & will have something to talk about.
-COme up with a new word and use it in your everyday vocabulary. People will ask you what it means!!!
I hope those helped, it os some of the things I do when I am at a loss for words!
]
Yes yes I'm the same way. I'm not that great at starting a conversation and I hate eye contact. I'll tell you how I deal with these problems.
First, eye contact. For me, whenever someone looks me in the eye, it feels like they're looking into my soul and feel vulnerable. This solution is actually quite simple: LET people see your soul. You see, shyness is simply the fear you feel when you think someone might notices your flaws. If you KNOW someone will see your flaws no matter what, however, you won't be as afraid anymore (trust me, it'll make sense in the long run). That's why asano says you should not only let people see your flaws, you should wear them as a badge of honor. That way people know exactly who you are the moment they meet you. This will also aliviate your 'dull person syndrome' sinse people like this seem to be more distinguished.
As for your topicless dilemma, that's a bit harder to solve. I generally just wait for a conversation to start and then jump in, but if you REALLY want to start a dialogue, here's what I suggest: start coming up with topics in you head BEFORE you meet up with friends. That way you're RAWRing to go when you start talking!
Well, I hope I've helped in some minute way. If not, then feel free to throw virtual rocks at me.
]
Just be like "Hey whatsup?" or "How are you?"
or you could be like "How do you think you did on the test?" or
"Do you have a myspace?" or "did you do the math homework?" if you want to bring up conversations.
If you want to hold a conversation don't just say not much or "meh" or "im bored" when people say "whatsup", but actually tell them how you are, say "just watching tv" (say a show) and they will be like "what show?"and you say "spongebob" (haha) and they say "i love that show!" , then be like "Me too its the one were he forgets to tie his shoe" and the conversation will go on!
And for looking people in the eye, this is what I do.
Make it a game. See how long you can look into someones eyes before you look away, or dare yourself to just look into their eyes while they talk!
Always works ;)
Hope I helped!
Good luck! :]]
<3
]
i know how you feel. all the guys are always flirting with my bff taglia and it gets annoying. so i get shy because im self conscious. this might be how you feel. when im having a good day im fine and very social and everyone loves me. but when im having a bad day, people dont want to be around me. is this how you feel? so when you feel good about yourself, things just pop up to talk about. and maybe just start by saying stuff like "i need new shoes" or "what have ya been up to?" i sometimes get quiet when im talking and everyone is just staring at me. so then what im saying is not that interesting to them because im so quiet. speaking up is one of the most important things to do when you're in a big group. i hope that helped you!
sincerely,
haley
]
More Questions: |