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Hes always lieing to me..
So I found out that my boyfriend of 2 months lied to me about smokeing weed. he swore he would never lie again but obviously i dont belive him considering he lied the first time. Now that hes lied, I always think that hes lieing to me about EVERYTHING..I dont want to break up with him but I dont want to be with him if I think hes lieing..I know this is confusing but how can I just find out the truth when I think hes lieing? Should I just trust him until I catch him in the act? PLEASE HELP!
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well he probally didn't want to tell you that he smoked that cause some people would dump him if he did that..like my friend did to this boy.
well i knwo he didnt want to tell you because..this happened to my friend..she found out that he smoked weed cuz i told her that he told me..and he told me he still does( he told her he doesnt anymore ) but doesnt want me to tell her and she's my best friend ..and i asked y.? he said cuz then she won't like my anymore.
just tell him yuo have to trust him and he has to trust yuo becuase ..thats how it works..cause sooner or later the truth will come out.
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you know, its tricky. you dont want to be gullible and trust everything, but you dont want to be untrusting either. you have to find a medium.
not trusting someone or lying to someone are both things that end relationships fast. its hard to trust someone who's lied to you about something as big as smoking weed, but maybe he lied to you about it because he's kindof ashamed of it and he just doesn't want you to know because he cares about you and really wants to be with you.
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So, Sami Story Time.
I used to date a guy that, in two months, became homeless and a crackhead. He promised me, PROMISED, that he would never do drugs around me or see me when he was high and that he would go home to his mom if he couldn't find a place to live in two weeks. Instead, he did meth in front of me, lived on a golf course for six months and started sleeping around with every girl that could offer him somthing (bed, food, pot, meth, etc).
In the end, I had to let him go. Between the heartache and the distrust I had for him, it just was not worth my sanity.
It sounds like this guy is going to drive you mad, simply because he messed up once. I am NOT saying that you should leave him, because that would be irresponsible advice, but what I AM saying is that you need to seriously sit down and think about whether you can live with the paranoia or if it would be healthier for you to move on, as hard as that might be for you.
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If you want to be with him still, and if he promised he would never lie to you again, then accept it and move on with the relationship. You might always have a nagging suspicion that he's lying in the back of your head. But don't dig into it, and don't harrass him about it. If he does start lying to you, chances are high that you will eventually catch him in a lie again. At that point, then you have a valid excuse for breaking up with him, because then you know that his lying behavior will continue, despite his apologies.
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This happen's to girls alll of the time. Guys lie about silly things but what it all comes down to is the fact that he cares about you and he wants you. Why else would he lie about smoking pot? I've done it, it is nothing great. The most you can do is try and talk him out of it without wining (guys can't stand it). Give him another chance, and most importantly, sit him down for a talk and just straigt up tell him how you fell .. say something like this .. "So we've been going out for 2 month's and I really like you but it bothers me soo much that you lied to me about something so dumb especially when you swore to never lie to me. Now whenever you tell me something, no matter how much I want to belive you, i'm just not sure on what to belive. I don't want to break up with you but being in a relationship we need to be able to trust eachother and not lie." Just say something like that to see how he reacts. I meen, the worst that will happen is he will keep smoking weed but depending on how much he cares about you and being with you ... that is what will determine you two still dating.
I really hope that I helped. If you have anymore problems just message me, i've been through a lot & i'll do my best to help <3 (:
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Well... its hard to say. i have really good lying senses! When you tihnk that hes lying confront him and be like "are you lying to me please tell me the truth i wont get mad i just want to know the truth!" i yhave been out with soo many guys that lie to me so i am pretty much used to it by now. Sometimes it can be psychological haha like you can think just cause he lied once he will do it again. but in reality if you really do believe him then just do! And i mean there are worse things hje could be doing than smokking weed...
<3
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