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everyone found out :(
14/f
to say it straight, i got fingered and gave the boy a handjob in return. and my friend told this kid and he told everyone. alot of people hate me now, and all this shit is going around. i just kind of shrug it off and i'm like Shit Happens. haha, i know i shouldn't have ... i regret it alot but even his cousin who is in my sisters grade foudn out! she told me to "stay the fuck away from her cousin" and i'm not worried about my sister finding out cause i told her haha. but i just don't know what to do i feel so bad, like i want to kill myself. i'm already in counseling for feeling like this. i just don't know what to do. and how to handle this. please help D:
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The same exact thing happened to me. Dont feel bad about it and dont regret it. it's a normal thing. and the people in your grade need to grow up and get a life. They're probably all horny and jealous because they havent gotten the chance to do that yet. ha. it'll be old news in a few days or weeks. trust me. thats exactly how it was at my school. ah and by the way. im 14/f and if you ever have a problem like this again you can talk to me. i'm pretty sure i've been through it all. any more questions?? you know where to find me. :)
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#1, dump him!!! hes a jerk if he does that to you..
#2 you should be proud to dare to have sex, its very normal u know... some people laugh about sex , but i so totally look forward do it (13years.) so nothing to be ashame of, i bet they also wanna get laid sometimes..
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ADDITIONAL: I think you should shop around for a new best friend to be brutally honest. Her behavior is inexcusable and you need to take her to task on it. Just remember if you do stay friends to keep your private business to yourself because she can't be trusted not to blab.
ORIGINAL:
The only mistake you made was in telling a so-called friend who is a real blabbermouth with no sense of self-control the intimate details of a private thing you did with a male friend. You learned a valuable lesson to keep private and especially intimate details of your life to your boyfriend and yourself.
You shouldn't feel guilty as both you and him consented to what you were doing and that kind of experimentation is quite common with your age group. Nothing really dirty about it.
Having said this only you and the guy really know what went on. Your friend may tell the whole entire world about it but if neither you nor the guy react or confirm what your now ex-friend said than it should die down.
His cousin may have found out but has no confirmation it's really true unless he told her so. Even if she dislikes you over what she heard or told you to stay away it's up for the guy to tell you whether to leave him alone or not. For right now creating distance between you and him is a great idea.
You really didn't do anything wrong. Most of those people are either jealous (your friend especially) or doing similar things themselves but not talking about it. They're probably treating you this way because they think you told and bragged about it.
Forget about all of this and go about your business and once they see you can't be bothered by it they'll find a new rumor or story and someone else to gossip about. You just have to learn not to kiss and tell in the future. Don't tell anyone and this kind of stuff won't happen to you.
Definitely get rid of this ditzy idiot you call your friend as she's bad news. Certainly don't trust her with any kind of secret or info. You ought to ask her what she was thinking and why she told something so personal about someone else to everybody? I'd like to know the answer but bet it has to do with her liking the guy etc.
You don't need a counselor to go over this with you as you're the victim here of what others have said. You're biggest and only mistake is that you shared something very personal with others when you should have kept your mouth shut.
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ok your class mates need to grow the fuck up [excuse the language]
i agree it's nothing to be hated for probably half the people that are laughing at you did the same thing and thats why they laughing and talking shit.
just ignore these kids they'll move on to someone else in about a week or two.
[p.s. im not going to tell you what to do because its your desicion but my advice is dont do it again with someone random and if you do keep it lowkey dont tell anyone most importantly dont trust anyone with personal information cuz no matter how close you are to someone they will be nosy with it.]
GOODLUCK! keep your head up & fu*k wat ppl say;]
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I have been in your position before. Once upon a time I was 14 and a girl in my grade got fingered. She was such a slut! Just kidding, but we all thought that way. I can assure you nobody will care at some point. Just take it as a lesson learned and let it blow over. People your age thrive on making other people feel bad, unfortunately you are just the source of a lot of gossip. I promise it will blow over, and nobody hates you. Someone thought it would be fun to pick on you and everyone else joined their side rather than become the butt of the joke. It's cruel, but that's how middle school works.
On the other hand, take this as a life lesson. Before you do anything you should consider the consequences and whether or not you are willing to face them. Before you get physical with another guy, decide whether or not you could handle everyone finding out. Judging from the fact that you're contemplating suicide, I would say you aren't ready. Take a break from guys. You're 14, you aren't going to find the love of your life any time soon, and you aren't missing out on anything but cheap thrills and ridicules by holding out a little longer. Good luck with everything. Take care.
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