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I think I'm addicted to cybersex.
Anyone have any ideas on how to stop?
I can't do things I need to do, because I'm so busy cybering, and no matter how hard I try, I keep going back. Help!
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
I see that you understand this has become a problem of yours. You've clearly stated that you are unable to do the things you are needing to do because you end up in an erotic chat.
Many people have problems with keeping their mind on track on the internet as it is. Friendly chatting, web-surfing, and online-games can side track a person from their work. Many companies have had to put blocks on websites so that their employees will actually do the jobs they were hired for. Your problem is really no different.
Just as a side note, you can google up "cybersex addiction" and find that it's becoming more common. Professional counseling sessions seem to be suggested along with a few things I've listed below. You may also look into support groups for sex-addicts or online-addicts as some of the websites claim that these have been beneficial.
If you are seriously wanting to stop this behavior then you need to take every action that you can. This will be hard work mentally and you'll have to really push yourself to stick to things. It may be helpful to write these things down and post them at your computer so that you can remind yourself of your goals.
The thing to do is to make yourself stay clear of it completely. Even if you're tempted to do it, have the will power to say no. You simply need to control your urges and you CAN if you put your mind to it.
Make it a goal to go so long without sexual conversation and work up from there. First, make it a one-day or one-week goal and then raise the bar higher. Keep a calender to mark off at your computer so that you are reminded how long you've made it. Soon, you'll notice that you no longer have the desire to seek out these conversations. Stick to your goal and treat yourself every now and again with something you like--a new pair of shoes, new clothes, or even just a trip out somewhere. Reward your good behavior :)
Block and delete people from your contact lists that may initiate such contact. Don't bother explaining why you will be riding yourself of them because they may try to talk you out of it and you could end up back where you started. Block the websites and chat-rooms you go to when finding a cyber-sex partner (you can have a friend or family member set up the block if needed). If you really must, delete your old screen-names and remake your list, adding only the people that you know do not engage in such activities. If that isn't enough, delete your messenger services. Heck, if you must, don't sign online if you don't absolutely need to! Get rid of temptation.
Limit the time you have access to the internet. Set aside a limited amount of time you are able to be online a day and focus on getting your work done in that time. Fill in the rest of your time doing offline activities (more information below). Upping your daily time of face-to-face, non-sexual human interaction will help you move past this issue.
Put your excess time into something more useful. If you notice that you've finished work early on the computer, sign offline and participate in something more constructive. There are tons of things you can do. You can help at your local soup kitchen or homeless shelter, make packages to send to the batter women's shelter or overseas to troops, read to children at your local library, spend time with the elderly at nursing homes, join an organization and help them collect donations or such. I helped hand out pamphlets and cards after I joined RAINN:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
I also joined The American Diabetes Foundation and collected donations for them. There are many things you can join in your community to help you occupy your free time with something more useful.
Now, I'm not saying to rid yourself of all sexuality, just simply stop incorporating another person into your sexual activities. If you want to masturbate, then fine, but don't seek out a partner for such things. Keep your eye on the goal and work hard toward it.
This will take a lot of work on your part but I do hope you're able to overcome it.
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its not bad, unless thats all your doing.. try maybe unplugging your computer or turning it off or go be active and go out with some friends or anything to take your mind off of it.. read a book? haha anything can work like that.
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Ehhh...Cybersex isn't bad. Being addicted to sex(any type) is normal in my eyes. You don't need to completely stop, just lessen the amount. It's like being addicted to eating cookies. There not bad, just not the best thing to eat constantly. You don't have to stop liking cookies, just lessen the intake! Oh and make sure that when you do have cybersex, It is legal and you're not paying some one or watching underage 'People'.
Hope I helped!=)
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