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Abusive?
Okay so I have a boyfriend who recently hit his mom..Okay more like bruised it up.. and he might be heading for boot camp this summer. and he threw a plazma Big screen tv at his 12 yr, brother.
he says his brother was throwing a chair at him though. few months ago he got sent to his dads cause he did somehting wrong then him and his dad got in a fist fight.. he says he "Beat the s*** out of him" which isnt all that good sense he got searched, hand cuffed and taken down to the police station.. should i be worried? hes not abbusive right? just a temper?
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He is abusive, and he has a temper. You'd be a fool not to break up with him, and he'll probably threaten you once you do it, and then you call the police.
Evidence that he is abusive;
1) He hit his mother. You're not supposed to hit females, let alone your own mother. So he's obviously a psychopath.
2) He threw a plasma TV at his brother. If his brother was coming at him with a chair, then I'm fine with him throwing something at him. Just not a plasma TV. Normal people do not throw plasma TVs. Normal people watch their TVs; they don't use them as weapons.
3) Do you honestly think that with his history of violence he didn't start the fight with his dad? Bragging about beating the shit out of your dad is not a normal thing to do, because normal people don't beat the shit out of their fathers.
4) Cops don't randomly take people to the station in cuffs. They take people that deserve and are dangers to the people around them; you.
In conclusion, break up with him, and do it in a large crowd where you can be safe when he explodes.
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That is physical abuse, and he is abusive. You indicated that he threw a PLASMA at his brother? Yeah, he is abusive no doubt.
And just because his brother MAY HAVE did it to him doesn't give him a right to throw such a LARGE object.
It seems that your boyfriend lives in a violent home, all his familty that are in the house can be a threat to you. Just imagine, you might think that he won't do that to you because 'he loves you' and your his g/f. But being violent like that?
JUST THINK and IMAGINE, if you say one 'wrong' thing or if you offend him in any way, he'll take a blow to your face. You don't want to get into a relationship like that, many girls have done that and they feel that they can't leave but you can. LET HIM GO. It's scary but girls/women have died in abusive relationships. It's the truth think about that.
Just let him down easily, say something like 'I think we should just be friends' and if he asks you why say you're busy or something like that.
Just be careful.
You can find someone better than him. SERIOUSLY, you may think that is hard but its really not. If you continue with this relationship it will only get worse and most likely you'll be unhappy and worried to leave. Break it off now.
Ask yourself this question.
You don't want to be with someone who makes you worry and wonder whether he's going to physically hurt you do you? ... or be with someone whos going to jail getting in trouble and make you worry.
Be with someone who isnt going to make you worry; and this guy will make you worry all the time. Be with someone who has a happy lifestyle who HASNT been to jail for drugs or alcohol or abuse. You want someone to make you happy NOT worry; I KNOW THAT FOR A FACT.
Hope I helped.
Hope I helped.
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A 'temper' that leads to harmful physical action IS PHYSICAL ABUSE. That is pretty much the defination of being physically abusive right there.
You should be worried. Worried about being close to someone whoes household allows this behavoir and a young boy who is willing to physically attack his mother, father and a child younger then him.
You should be worried, you are dating an abuser. You are simply lucky not to have fallen into the line of fire yet. You should keep yourself safe. If you don't have the strength to dump him, at least keep your distance until he learns to behave like a human being and express VERY keen unhappiness with his choices.
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First of all I think he needs serious anger management classes and its not just his temper he seems to be an agresive person and that is something you should be aware of.
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It sounds like you need to find a new boyfriend. A temper is when you get impatient and maybe cuss and yell..
...hitting people and throwing things is completely different. If he doesn't respect his parents enough not to hit them, how do you think he will treat you after the shine wears off?
He obviously has a serious anger problem and possibly some serious mental disorders. Trust me from experience, you can't fix him no matter how hard you try or how reasonable you try to be, and eventually he will just pull you down with him. "Get out while the gettins' good!"
Hugs,
Jasmine
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Ofcourse you should be worried . I dont think you heard of the saying " If you want to know how a boy will treat you , look at the way he treats his mother". If he didnt have a problem doing this to his own mother , what makes you think you are any better for not getting hit. You really either need to help him , or break it off because no one needs to be in a abusive relationship.
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My boyfriend is bi-polar, his temper is horrible but he has never hit his own family or anything like that. It's obvious he's abusive. He has hit his mother and used objects to hurt his brother.. If he hit his mom, I'm sure he wouldn't have any problem hurting you. He would probably try pulling off that "it's just my temper" excuse. I'm sure he's a nice guy to you but I have a feeling, if you made him extremely angry, he might take it out on you.
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