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i need help
basically i used to be a normal girl untill a lot of shit happened. if something even so little goes wrong ill want to break down and cry and hurt myself.. ive abused drugs just once the other night, i feel like im entering something that could lead to worse things.. like actually takin my life. ive gone to a psyciatrist, a counselor, ive tried everythingg.. i just dont know what to do, any advice, not involving proffesional help?
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Want to answer more questions in the Health & Fitness category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
you most likely break down with little things because you know what CAN happen even if it won't. i do that all now, after a tragedy struck in my life.
that's not really advice and i probably didn't help, but there's my say on it..
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First off, it sounds like you're trying to control your emotions so strongly that when you hit a crisis situation (or you've been pushed to your limit of self-control) you literally freak out. You need to know that it is perfectly fine and acceptable to cry and let our your emotions.
If you have a good friend (or boyfriend or girlfriend), this is the time to open up to him/her and ask for emotional support. Explain to the friend what you're needing from them and ask if they have the time to let you lean on them for support. Explain to them your problems and let them know if you're actually asking for advice or if you're really just wanting a good person to vent to.
If at all possible, you may want to lean on the support of a parent. They are adults and have had many experiences in life so they might be able to understand some of your emotions and help you work through them. I do understand if this is simply not an option though but you do need to find someone to lean on.
From there you need to learn to relax around the person and if you're having a bad day, go to them and simply talk. If you need to cry, they'll then expect it and you'll feel more comfortable crying with them. Break down and cry, scream outside, talk a mile-a-minute about your feelings--whatever it takes to get it out!
It isn't alright to hurt yourself but you can alter your behavior. When you realize that you're getting so upset to the point that you're going to hurt yourself, try to occupy yourself with something else. As I noted, having a good friend with you is comforting and maybe you will be less-likely to self-harm. A few of the things I'm listing below may be things you can do to get your mind off of hurting yourself.
You realize that the drug usage is turning into a scary road and it is really important that you see that. Turn back now while you have the chance. Learn to let out what you're feeling in helpful ways. Be more aware of your actions. Think through the possibilities. Put your energy into something more useful. Take note of what you're feeling and then backtrack to what made you feel that way--find out if it's a rational feeling or if you're simply over-reacting. From there, try to figure out ways to solve the issue instead of putting your energies into finding ways to hurt your body.
I've heard that when people are upset, painting or drawing can really help them express it. I'd suppose that playing an instrument would also help express what you've been holding back. You could paint and give those paintings to the elderly in the nursing home (they've love it) or you could play soft music to them outside during the daytime.
You want to make some goal to really work toward that involves helping others--make up some packages to send to your local battered women's shelter, bake some goods for the battered women's shelter as special treats, start helping at a soup kitchen, help out at a homeless shelter, see about reading to children at story hour at your local library, visit a nursing home weekly and spend time with the elderly, run errands for an elderly neighbor just to make his/her life easier in old age (heck, just spend time with them; many elderly men and women are alone and have really interesting stories to tell), mow the yards of your elderly neighbors, tutor younger children in classes they're having difficulties in for free, find a place to read the Bible to others, and there are tons more other things I'm sure you can think of that are helpful to others and keep you occupied. Make your goal to do one (or however many) of these things per day/week/etc.
You may also want to join an organization that helps others. Here is a link that allows youth to help out in their community:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
You can search for a group in your area.
You may also want to think about working for a charity. One summer I sat outside of a Wal-Mart and took donations all day for the diabetes foundation even though I do not have diabetes myself. I've also joined RAINN ( [Link](Mouse over link to see full location) ) and helped spread pamphlets and cards out to others. There are many organizations you may be able to help in. You may just want to head over to Google and search what you're interested in (such as an environmental organization).
Start a daily journal for you. It's important to journal at least once a day (preferably at the end of the day) so you can look back and see what spurred some emotion(s). This will also help you see improvement in yourself as you progress. You can look back and see how helpful you have been and how your life can turn around.
Make a conscious effort to change. Try to be more aware of what you're doing. If you're fighting back tears maybe you shouldn't be. If you're feeling a strong emotion, find a way to express that in a non-harmful manner. Put your energy into helpful things that mean a lot to others.
I hope you know that realizing you may be on the wrong path gives you the opportunity to change for the better. I understand you may be going through difficult times but I'm sure you can overcome this with some time and conscious effort.
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It's really difficult to give you a straight forward answer if you don't elaborate on what this "shit" is. If professionals were unable to help you, I don't see how anyone who isn't a professional can.
Really. I am not trying to be rude, but maybe if you were to open up a bit and explain what this "shit" is someone could help you out. Obviously I am not in your shoes, nor do I know the extent of your problem.
However, I guess if I was going to take a stab at it just by a comment you made, "If something even so little goes wrong, I want to break down and cry and hurt myself." That right there tells me you are under a lot of stress. A simple solution would be to just let go of the things you can't control.
If people don't like it, "screw 'em." You've got to start looking out for yourself. There's only so much that someone can take. Drugs are definitely not the answer, neither is suicide.
If you feel you can't go on and really need someone to talk to, call this number: 1-800-784-2433 There are folks there 24-7 who wont judge and will to listen to you.
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