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Promiscuity..


Question Posted Sunday March 9 2008, 7:53 pm

Okay, I've never really engaged in sex until my senior year started in August. Since then, I've just been sleeping around. I would say that I've slept with at least 15-16 guys since August. Why all of the sudden am I so promiscuous?

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Peeps answered Monday March 10 2008, 6:18 pm:
There could be a number of reasons why you are doing this to yourself. I suspect you realize it's wrong since you don't speak so positive about what you've been doing.

It could be a lack of knowledge about sexually transmitted disease and infections. If you aren't sure what you could catch from being sexually intimate with another person then you may feel there is no need to be "picky" about your partners, especially if you're using a form of birth control and haven't been taught they sometimes fail (yes, there is ALWAYS a chance of them failing).

Here are some VERY scary facts about STDs:

[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)

On Wikipedia there is some more information on STDs and they even have a list later down the page, you should really check them out:

[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)

It could be guilty feelings of not waiting for the right partner. A childhood dream of getting married and having the perfect life has just crashed and your first was not your only. For many people, losing their virginity and later being dumped for another man/woman sparks something in them that causes a self-hatred.

Deep down inside they realize they messed up their chance at a fairytale life. They begin to throw themselves into a self-destructive pattern and it's often difficult for them to realize they have a problem and need to seek out professional help.

A lack of care and attention at home could be the problem. This could date back to your childhood and you not even realize it. A way of receiving some sort of love (as sex is perceived as loving) and attention is to go out and offer what you know will snag such a feeling--your body. Many people have this problem and must go into therapy to work it out. There are many support groups even that you could join if you feel this may be the root cause.

It could be a form of rebellion. Many young people know their parents and God disapproves of sexual relations before marriage. They are now being told by the media to view it as a way to be their own person. Teenagers today are being brainwashed to rebel against their parents and to turn their backs on religion for happiness.

There's also a major possibility that it's all about this day and age. Sex is being played up to be popular and that we should all engage in sex with as many people as possible because it feels good. Now that we have condoms and birth control pills, patches, rings, and shots sex is being made-out to be completely safe. We aren't pressed that all of these methods have been known to fail and none of them fully protect against STDs/STIs (which can lead to sterilization or birth defects in infants if pregnancy is possible).

What's more horrifying is now we are taught that if the method we are using does fail, we can throw the result of it away without negative feelings. Having an undeveloped human removed from your womb so that you can have a feel-good life means destroying a life for selfishness. Leaving an infant at a hospital for later adoption because you're "not ready" to be a parent is also very selfish.

It was never a surprise that sex resulted in pregnancy. It was never a surprise that having sex meant you could catch an STD/STI and if a person became pregnant while having these it could mean a disabled child. We are being taught to ignore these factors.

Daily we are pushed to have sex though. We no longer think about consequences. We now strive for some sick form of popularity that could leave us scared for the rest of our lives. We are taught that if you want someone to like you then you have to be sexual. We are taught that if we have a contraceptive then everything will be alright. We are being taught lies and nobody has enough sense to push for the truth and not fall into the trap.

The media tells us that "sex" is vaginal intercourse. In reality sex can be vaginal, anal, and even oral. You can contract STDs from all of them but we're now being told that vaginal intercourse is the only one we should be worrying about. There are always major risks when engaging in sexual activity and any type of sex is sex to God.

It almost seems like a government conspiracy. The more STDs and STIs we get, the more chance we have given up our ability to later reproduce. With this comes more and more fertility clinics with higher and higher prices. The more it's pushed by the government that all birth control methods are safe, the more we believe this to be the truth. The more HIV/AIDs victims we get, the more people need to be dependent on the government for medication and income.

Scary, isn't it? And just think, it can take 10 years before a person shows up as HIV positive and they never even knew it!

It could also be a mental inability to choose right from wrong. If you know you're putting you and every person you have sexual relations with at risk for STDs and STIs then it's important to seek out a good therapist.

You know you risk pregnancy and have no negative feelings toward giving the child a hard life from being unprepared (or killing the life so you can pretend there are no consequences). If urges cannot be properly controlled for whatever reason then the person truly needs to seek out help.

Any way it is, you have a serious problem that you know needs to be fixed. Stop this cycle and seek out help if you need it to be able to stop. Think of what you're wagering by being sexually active. Think of the consequences and how you would handle each of them.

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JerZ answered Sunday March 9 2008, 10:55 pm:
Yes.

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luvbug555 answered Sunday March 9 2008, 9:55 pm:
hi honey,

please dont feel bad about it.
at least you know how many boys! and its not that many...
what happened happened.

now just concentrate on learning from it, and finding an alternative.

maybe you liked the freedom of your senior year?
or maybe you liked the control of having all the boys.

i dont know how you were feeling, but you do.
ask yourself how you felt sleeping with all of those guys. and finally being at your senior year.

then redirect that energy.
maybe you could concentrate on making a bunch of senior pranks or throwing a ton of parties or doing your homework (JK!)

just do the things you love. and dont worry about it. just because you might have acted promiscously dosent make you a slut.

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oxGingerKidxo answered Sunday March 9 2008, 9:50 pm:
Okay...so the person below me is an idiot.
You are not a slut.
I think that the reason you have been sleeping with so many guys lately is because you want to feel some sort of acceptance, and that you feel like its the only thing you have to offer. ITS NOT. Trust me you have so many more things to offer...and plus do you really want to keep offering something like that to people you dont even know? You could get pregnant/std's. That would ruin your life. So first thing you need to do is to stop sleeping around. You may already have to reputation but once you stop, people will eventually stop talking about it and guys will stop trying to take advantage of you.
I want the next time you engage in sex, to be with someone that you really like or love, someone that you trust, and someone that doesn't have a bad character, someone who likes you for you and not for your looks, and of course that you have been dating for a while.

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swoods7 answered Sunday March 9 2008, 8:23 pm:
maybe because its that u like the feeling of sleeping around... im not saying your a slut but that maybe you like feeling bad like that. do you know what i mean? but if you think its wrong then you can adjust. lol

sarah catherine

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