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Is this child abuse?
I have been divorced for 3 years. My ex married a girl who wanted me dead throughout our 10 year marriage. She has a few screws loose. She has succeeded in shutting out his entire family,threatend to have me killed, now she is working on our children. My kids would always come home sad. Finally my 10 and 11 year old girls came home and said that when the new wife picks up and brings home our kids for the weekend she says " Me and your father had sex last night.." and proceeds to describe it!!!! I asked my girls why they didnt tell me before and they were too ashamed.My girls said they have sex with the door wide open also, the wife says that she has an open door policy in her home. How disgusting. I have done everything I can to get along with this woman but she is psychotic. The girls told her they are uncomfortable with it and she said too bad we are an open family and we discuss everything.. POWER TRIP?? Is there anyone out there who thinks this is INSANE? WHAT SHOULD I DO??? I adore my kids and want the best for them. Thank you! Kimberly
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Yes, you must call CPS immediately and also get your kids into couseling. I would take your ex to court again and sue for full custody of the kids. This woman is evil and she is a terrible influence on your young girls.
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You need to shut her little game down hard. Report both of them to CPS. File child abuse against her specifically both criminally and civil. Get a lawyer to call her and rattle her cage. Call her job and have your lawyer interview (deposition)her colleagues about this. Get a court order of protection from them to keep your kids from going there. Have your kids depositioned by an attorney. If you think you can get away with it, have a male friend confront her in front of friends and family about these specific acts she has been blabbing about. Sue both of them. He needs to see you are the tougher female here. These are your kids.
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Call your ex and request his input on this matter. If he doesn't realize that this is inappropriate behavior and isn't open to speaking to his wife and ceasing it, tell him you'll be speaking to a family lawyer, and then do.
If he can't grasp that this behavior is harmful to his young children, he needs some assistance coming to that realization. If nothing else, he needs to understand you have an equal say in these children's sex education and your say on graphic sexual descriptions is NO. I would turn a blind eye if this happened once, and explain it to the children as a very poor attempt to educate them, but if this is happening repeatedly, it is simply sick.
This might not qualify as 'child abuse' but it certainly qualifies as poor behavior and a blatant disrespect of one parents wishes which is likely covered in your custody agreement. Get the courts involved in mediation and aim to get a parenting coach involved with your ex and his wife. They need it, and the coach will encourage them to have better skills working with you as well.
An 'open door' policy is very effective with small children, older children need to earn and practice their privacy, as well as be exposed to new information in a controlled and intelligent way. A parenting coach will understand that. I would encourage you to make that your main goal with your lawyer.
Also, for goodness sake DOCUMENT all threats. Even if it has not escalated to the point where you can charge her, any and every possible threat she has made to you should be documented for the day that she does cross the line.
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Yeah I am going to agree with young grandma. I think you need to talk to your atorney. I mean if you have visitation and you are divorced I imagine that you have an atorney. I would let them know about this disorderly conduct and ask what can be done. First of all though you need to get some proof. You wont be able to just go into a court room and make accusations without any proof. Is there a way that you can like legally get a confession on tape? Find out. Or here is an idea, you could e-mail her and don't mention the court thing at all or she will start acting more distreet. E-mail her and say hey I hear you are talking about this and that with the kids is this true and if so why are you doing it? All you need is one responce from her admitting to it and then you will have your written proof. See if you can get her to admit to specific things. Make your questions direct and specific. Then you got that plus your kids testimony. The fact is...I don't think it qualifies as child abuse, but you do have a say so in what you children are exposed to because you are their parent. You are their blood. I wish you the best and I hope it works out for you. Peace.
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You definatley need to tell your ex
what is going on. There are some things
you just don't discuss with the kids.
Tell him if it doesn't stop you will
have no choice but to do something
about it. He will just have to visit
your kids without her being there and
no overnights at their house.
If he can't resolve it, you may have
to go back to your lawyer for advice.
I don't know that it would be considered
abuse, but if your kids are not comfortable
then you will have to find out what
options there are for you. I would
check with your lawyer about it.
Good luck.
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