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Stupid parents...
Can anyone help me convince my parents to let me be me? They are like trying and telling me to live a decent life and doing what's proper for me to make me happy, but the problem is I don't like it! I wanna have fun and do what I wanna do. My style is emo by the way and my parents don't know that and I don't think I wanna tell them cause I don't think they will ever understand. Right now I'm trying to get a mohawk and color it blue but my parent's say no and I don't understand why. One, I don't care what people will think of me, and two just cause I'm looking like those teens that they see out in the streets doesn't mean I'm gonna be like them! And if I become one then it's their own fault. I mean not all teens are like that, there are some who have cool parents who let them do what they want and plus only reason I think they are out on their own is cause probaly their parents are probably like mine so maybe I should go out on my own if I have to. I just don't understand why my parents are like that. I know what they are doing think is gonna make me happy but it's not. I basically need help fighting for my independence and ways to convince them to let me have my god damn mohawk LOL. Sorry but I seriously want them to let me live my life my way. I'm already sixteen and I wanna live my life to the fullest and while I'm still young.
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You will have plenty of time to live your life your way when you turn 18 and move out.
It seems to me this is not only a respect issue but a maturity issue. If you say it will be your parents fault if you turn out like the kids on the street because they are trying to do what they believe--as your parents with a lot more life experience than you--is the best option for you right now then you are blaming them for your actions and that isn't a sign of maturity. Parents who allow their kids to do whatever they want and don't have expectations not only set their children up to fail they also do them a disservice with lazy parenting.
I was allowed to do what I wanted when I was your age, actually from the time I was 13, but I also respected my parents, didn't give them lip, did what chores I was asked, kept a 4.0 average. I didn't have a curfew but I always told them when I would be home and was usually home half an hour before that. I skipped the mohawk but died my hair rainbow--yes rainbow-- all 7 colors. They allowed me freedoms based on my behavior.
If your style is "emo" then you aren't ready to do your own thing and live your own life. When you are--you don't feel a need to classify yourself.
My daughter is your age and graduated a year early--she will be 17 in a couple of weeks and starting college in the fall. She decorates her room the way she chooses, she pretty much sets her own curfew, she dates, she spends time with her sisters, she works and she does what she is asked at home without lip. We let her dress the way she chooses and do her hair and make up the way she chooses. She has two piercings and a tattoo--that I signed and paid for. BUT she doesn't rebel either and if I had said no--like I did for the 3rd piercing she wouldn't disrespect me by saying "let me live my life while I'm young"
It's a parent's job to protect and advise their children based on the child's behavior. I would try talking to them and letting them know that you will do as you are asked if they will allow you some freedom of expression with your hair and mode of dress. My guess is they will be more receptive to a compromise if it isn't offered with a threat of "I'll just move out"
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my parents are like that too. they won't let you do that stuff because they are worried how their parenting will look to other parents.
try hair dye stuff that will just wash out, just to see what their reaction is.
i wouldn't fully cut your hair into a mohawk but try getting a haircut that would be optional so you can try out many different hair styles.
hope i helped..
(:
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I don't know how to help you, but I'll tell you this much- You are ONLY 16. You still have a lot of young life to live to the fullest. May not seem like it now, but you do. I promise.
As for blue mohawks, I just don't know what to tell you. I used to dye my hair a rainbow of colors when I was your age, but my parents were cool with it. Some parents just aren't (yours being in that category.)
Best bet is to realize you only have 2 more years until you can go out into the world on your own. You can have a blue mohawk and a purple foomanchu if you want then.
ygs-29/f
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This isn't a lecture, just a reminder.
I can see that your parents care for you very much. They are fearful as to what you're going to do with your life and they don't want you to turn into these street kids (and i do know that you don't want to be one of them). Remember, they've got your best interests in heart and what they're doing is what they feel is right to help you grow up.
You're at a critical stage in your life where you thinking about where you want to go and what you do in your life and your parents still want to be part of that life and to do that, try and guide you away from the streets. You can have a decent life and have fun at the same time, there are no boundaries between the two and you can still do what you want to do and still have a decent life. It not engraved in stone that all of these are seperate and you can only choose one, they're intergrated with each other.
The people whom you see out on the streets are there because of their parents caring, it's because that they don't give a d**n about what their kid does and that child will grow up alone without anybody to support them in what they do. So they turn to others who are in the same situation as they are and they become sort of a 'new family' to them and they loose respect for their parents.
Yours aren't like that, they're loving, caring and they want the best from you. That kids out their don't have what you've got: two loving parents whom don't their daughter to be like the kids in the street.
Mohawks are great and all, but you've got to remember that it will set you apart completely. Whether this is what you want i don't know but just consider this: do you really need it? How will it be able to help you do what you want to do or have a 'free and happy life'? I'm not saying that you shouldn't get one but just to re-consider. You can ignore this paragraph or take it into consideration.
So, how to get it. Tell your parents about why you want to get it. It helps to have the life that you want. BUT you must remember that what they've been doing was to help you get a good life. So promise them (and you MUST keep it) that you'll never turn into one of these kids in the street, you only want this mohawk to let you discover who you are. You're 16, and you want to find out what's in the world and the only way would be to express whom you are.
I hope this helped,
triquetra
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wow, well i can see both of points of view. i mean i understand why your parents say no and i understand why you want to.
one reason i think that they dont want you to do something like that is because of how other people will look at you (i know you wont care what people say but they will) plus them being born in a time so long ago, this is like hugely rebelious.
what i would say is that if they say no, listen ( i know that not what you want to hear but hear me out). instead ask them if you could do something else (like piercing?)
see if there is something else you can do because trust me if you dont listen to them now, they will only get more strict and that wouldnt be good, now would it?
try your best and for the time being "give up" or maybe take is slow mo (one thing at a time)
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