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Not afraid to be different, but others won't accept
Hey, I am 14/f and currently in grade 9.
When i made the transition from middle school to high school, i hardly knew anyone. Now, i know more people, and more comfortable. I am a really niice girl, smart and pretty. It took me a whole to realise it but i finally did. I'm pretty, but not like other girls. I have a huge nose, which takes up most my face. The other girls look so perfect. I have learned to work with it, and try to beautify myself more. Now, i do look pretty but not the way guys would want. And another thing. Im different. I am not like the other girls at my school. I am really smart, respectful to everyone and all the teachers, and i do not have a rep as a whore or anything. I seem like a nerd to people, and whatever i am fine with that, but these people cant accept me being different. I choose to stand out and not to drugs and be slutty. I choose not to give adtitude to my teacher and ive grown up to be respectful to everyone. But really, i seem like your average girl, i dress normally, i look normal, and i act like any other teenage girl. I just really need help though. The guys at my school make me feel ugly. They make me feel like I'm lower then them. They make me feel like waste, like im not "cool" enough. Just because I am not the skinnest, preetiest girl (in their eyes) they make me feel invisible. An example would be today. We were in class and a girl was sitting in front of me, talking to me. This guy that im somewhat close with, was leaving so he was bye and kissed her (RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE) and then turned to me, and patted me on the head. I was so frustrated over that because he made me feel so disgusting. Also, i like starting conversations with people and talking to them, so i usually strike up a convo with some cute guys in my class, and they usually just walk out of the conversation when saying one word or just act like they dont have time to talk to me or anything. It makes me feel useless, but i know im not. This is really irritating because i know i have something to offer, but the guys just look at the other (PRETTIER) girls and make me feel like crap. I know, this is only grade 9 and guys will change, but its lowering my self-esteem right now. I am smart and i've learned to only pay attention to those who matter, and mean something to me in my life but this has just gone too far. Please if anyone has ANY advice to share, it will be GREATLY appreciated.
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going from middle school to high school is a lot harder than most people would think. but your doing great if your sticking to being yourself. your absolutely right not go be slutty or druggies. however, people are so incredibly obnoxious these days, its incredible.
if you want people to respect you more, or for guys to be nicer, you have to show that your confident (not conceited, just that your happy with yourself,even if they leave you in conversations)
you also cant let people realize that what they do is getting to you
unfortunately kids todays will do anything for a laugh, even if that is hurting other people, when they realize it doesnt bother you, then its nothing funny, hence them stopping
good luck
and if its any consolation, just think in like 10 years all the obnoxious people who are sluts, druggies and the rest of them will wish they could work for you
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girl, trust me, i know EXACTLY how you feel. i feel the same way, except my self-esteem is crap. i have a big nose, too... :(
not my fault though, i got it from my dads side. but the weird thing is, is that i would be ugly without it, and my nose is girly and (not at all like my dads). anyways, i may have read it wrong, but it doesnt seem to me that they think you are ugly... i know it seems they treat you differently but trust me, guys begin to notice this stuff SOON. they will come around and realize thats wrong. not only that, but the USA's population is becoming overweight, and soon if it all stays the same, it will be weird to be skinny and "perfect" (which models and those girls at your school arent even "perfect"). i know you probably are not overweight, but you should consider joining this site. it will raise your self-esteem because its a site for girls who are not skinny, but for chubby or plus-sized women. Cool huh? and you will meet guys who are willing to be your friend and will treat you like a human being. you dont even have to be slutty for it. just be careful who you talk to, k? you can add me if you want to, too. my name is Mistress Slipknot on there too. and my icon is a skull that says "slipknot" on top of it. if this sounds intresting, then you can go to ning.com get an account and look for "bbw chatzone" and then it should be the very first one. a girl in a green hat (cartoon). you dont have to be big or chubby, you can just sign up for an admirer. but anyways, trust me, guys will start lining up to date you soon. they will realize that youre a great catch and start to see you as beautiful. if i can do it, so can you. im sure youre lovely.
good luck and i hope i helped
Mistress Slipknot
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Just reading this made me admire you so much for having the strength to be different among a group of people who just want attention. Trust me, you are far more beautiful than those girls you think are prettier..you know why? You have inner beauty, youre truly kind, youre UNIQUE..and those are the best qualities anyone can possess. the thing is, youre still in 9th grade, guys are just horny and it takes a while to find a TRULY nice guy who is looking for a truly nice girl. sadly alot of guys just talk to girls who flirt with them because once again, guys are horny. but see, youre different than the rest, and youre gonna be that girl that as the years go by, every good guy is gonna go after because youre strong and kind and have morals. do not EVER lose those qualities. that guy was just being a dick! guys are cocky, do not worry about him. dont ever let anyone feel make you feel useless, youre one of the few people left who have the power to change the world and make a difference. embrace being different and just know in your heart youre a better person than all those girls anyway, their looks will get them nowhere in life. and plus, we all have our imperfections..no ones nose is perfect and im sure youre gorgeous. what i really wanna say is: the state of the world we live in has developed a problem with accepting differences..but having the ability to STAY different and always stand out no matter what people think..is the best thing in the world because when youre older you can look back and say "at least i stayed true to ME" also..dont take any crap from anyone..if anyone is rude or disrepectul or thinks theyre better than you..speak your mind..and always remind yourself"what they think doesnt matter, i have people who love me for who i am" i promise you, everybody will change as time goes on, and people will start to realize how great it is that youre a nice girl that people can come to for advice. stay strong, be different, and just show the world how proud you are of yourself. one day theyll all go"damn i wish i was like her!"
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