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kind of long
so ive been going to a private school my entire life, ever since i was 3. and its been the same school too. ive also known the kids in my grade for about 11 years and weve gotten really close. but this school only goes up to 8th grade. last year was my last year at that school and graduating it was the saddest thing ever. ive never cried so much. so this year, [in september] i switched over to a public highschool, which is completely different by the way. only two of my friends from my old school came with me, but there not in any of my classes. so i had to learn the hard way and make completely new friends from scratch. it also sucks because these kids have known eachother since middle school and they already have their own groups. well the first month of school i thought id fit it in good and make a lot of new friends, but i thought wrong. its been about 5 months now and so far ive gotten 2 close friends, and about 5 friends i just talk to but were not close..and there not really the coolest of the bunch..[there not losers, but idk.] and sure i have those people i smile at in the hall, but thats nothing. i hardly talk to them. its just been really hard for me and i dont think anyone seems to understand. in all of my classes ive got one person to talk to, but still..there not my friends, really..only some of them. its complicated but sometimes i get embarssed when people see me talking to those people, since im new i dont want to be put into the loser catagory. and u know i dont think im a loser. this may sound conceited a little..but i should be talking to people that are better than that..you know. its hard to explain really but right now life is just ughh im not that happy with it right now. i havent been in a good mood for a really long time. i cant remember the last time..somethings wrong with me why arent i able to make more friends as easily as all of my other old school friends? all of them have their own group now..im litterly the only one. it really upsets me. i hope you understand how i feel
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Ohhhhhh, yes i understand how you feel. I've been left out a number of times and over time i've found that all this group stuff makes no sense and is stupid. You know what i did? I formed a group of one. I made a group of myself called The Me Group (well not really but its just an illustration.) The groups in your school are full of people that need other people to validate their being and social status. When youre by yourself then you might set a trend or something for at least one person. Your other friends probably made friends faster b/c they needed someone to validate their being. They weren't sure of who they were. If you stand alone then people will see that you know who you are and you can stand for yourself. You dont need a label.
Cliche Time: Just be yourself
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i have moved a lot! the longest ive ever lived in a place was three years and that was only once! the other times i moved like after two years. anyways, i know how to make friends! i kinda have to when i go to a new school.
i know its hard but here's what i did
-i smiled at everyone (at the right moments)
-i helped random people when they needed help (in class, hallway, liberary, this way people get to know you)
-starta conversation about something, anything (like "hey, what movie theaters are the best here?" or "which do you like better? subway or quiznos") random things to "break the ice"
-ask your "kinda friends" to the movies or some place like the football game or the school play (if no one invites you, invite them, they might be shy too)
that's what i did and i made friends really quick
also friendship develops over time
you are lucky that you had friends for such a long time, but its also good because you are getting a new experience
also try being a little more outgoing! be nice and smile and people will start to notice you and like you!
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I know exactly how you feel. Sometimes it is really hard to adjust to a new place, new school, and new friends. A way to make new friends is to find common interests that you have with the others. Do some snooping around and find out what you can. If you find common interests like music, sports, parties, mall, shopping, or even clothes. Use that to your advantage and you will be able to spark a conversation with the others. You can keep your old friends and talk to these new people. The key to having happiness is by making it. The only way things will change is if you make them. I learned as much as I could about sports and the music they were listening to, then brought up the conversation of it. We started talking more and more and the new person asked me to sit by her at lunch to talk more about it. That one person helped me click with the others.
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