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I don't know if I should believe him.
I hope a lot of people read this, because I need a lot of advice. My boyfriend and I have been dating for four months, and it's been the happiest four months I've had in a long time. Well, what happened, was before we started dating, him and his girlfriend at the time had just broken up. So, I'd log onto Myspace & she'd send me a bunch of crap saying how I was fat and ugly, and how I stole him from her. I ignored it. Honestly, I think she's insaneeee!
Anyways, I told Alex, my boyfriend when we first started dating, that I didn't mind if he talked to her, because I didn't want to seem possessive. But, like a week into them talking, he told me the stuff they were saying and I just told him he had to choose either her or me. I just didn't think it was fair, plus it made me really sad because she would constantly say how horrible of a person I am, to my boyfriend. So, he listened and stopped talking to her, then everything seemed okay, until..
randomly out of the blue like two weeks ago she sent him a message that says, "I miss you! I'm so sorry that I was mean to YOU! you have no idea how bad I feel. Please just talk to me." Alex said he wasn't going to respond to it, and that made me feel really good.
Yesterday, he had me log on to his e-mail account to send an e-mail to his teacher, I was bored so I clicked the "Sent" folder, and saw he had sent her an e-mail, and it said, "Hey. You've been trying to talk to me, so I'm assuming it's important. I can't talk to you on Myspace because Amy [ME] will see, so get on AIM sometime and we'll talk."
I told him I saw it, and he apologized like crazy, but I don't know, if I'm just getting mad for a stupid reason or what. I just really need to know, if I'm blowing this way out of proportion.
Even if you don't give me advice,
thanks for taking your time to read this.
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I know you probably felt pretty awful reading that and he was definitely wrong. But, if he was apologetic that's a great sign of the fact that he cares about you and wants to keep you.
You should take some precautions like, letting him know that now it's harder to trust him because of this. Don't let him off the hook with, 'I'm so sorry' you should tell him how it makes you feel and let it out. He should listen and not even argue with what you say. Don't suffer in silence.
You should include about how you feel of this Ex girlfriend. Tell him that you really don't want to ban him from a girl, but you truly can't even stand to think that he'd sit and listen to her talk about you horribly. And then you should say that you need to hear him tell her that it's over between them and that he's into YOU not her anymore. I think hearing him tell her this would bring you so much comfort, not to mention this girl needs to hear it.
And you should also say that truly, if theres something that this girl needs to talk with him about then obviously she wants to say something to him that wouldn't be ok with you.
I really hope this guy will do the right thing and keep you.
-TheTeenGirl
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Well, he is really trying to play both sides of the fence. You don't need him. Look for a guy that is honest and thoughful. It's always advisable to be "friends first" with the guys you date because then you'll you'll find out what kind of a fellow he is. If you feel dating is getting scary, just feel free to back out of it until you are mature enough to date. In fact, I recommend it. Always share information about your life with your parents and be careful on the Net! Tons of scary felons out there. Usually most girls don't really "seriously date" anyway until they are 18+ and in a University and looking for their future husband. If you are a Christian or a Jew, then remember to follow the guidance of God (or G-d, as the Jews spell Him) through your parents or religious leaders.
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you have the right to be mad but also maybe he's just trying to help her because this isnt normal shes really obsesed with her and he might have pitty for her and if you found out in any way they were talking you would have gotten mad. aslong as the message he sent her back wasnt saying oh i miss you too baby..you know then that would mean their up to something behind your back but since tats not the case you shouldnt be worried. He seems like he respects you because hes not the one trying to talk to her she is.
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He was wrong to not have told you, and you do have a right to be mad. Maybe he just wanted to talk to her so that she would leave you two alone, maybe he felt guilty about it and decided to hide it from you, and maybe he still has feelings for the girl. I suggest you talk to your boyfriend and ask why he hid it from you. I think that ther's a possibility he just needed closure, and didn't want you freaking out over nothing.
::Jasmine::
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I have to say, be cautious because if he went behind your back and wrote her after he already said he was going to ignore it, then he doesn't find it appropriate to tell you the truth the first time. I am not trying to be harsh, because that's not what I'm about but I'd watch him. Most people could swear up and down that they aren't writing someone, or they aren't talking to someone, .. and when you leave they are doing exactly what they promised they weren't doing. Good luck
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