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He wants me back again
I was in a serious relationship with someone for over 2 years at least. We broke up off and on and all of the break-ups were his decision. And he keeps coming back! Each time he leaves it's for less than a month and he's back. Well, this time we went the whole summer apart and now he's back again for a friendship. I'm NOT ok with this, I got weak and started crying when he called me asking to be friends. Then, he started saying that he doesn't want to hurt me and that maybe if we manage as friends we could try again as a couple. I really cannot decide what to do.
I mean I'm in love with him, so obviously I want to be with him. But, I really don't like being his friend. We've been talking every night for 3 days and I'm just wishing it was more all of the time because he's very show offish and kind of a jerk as my friend. But, he's the best and sweetest guy as my boyfriend. The reason he broke it off so many times is because of fighting and fearing we won't make it.
Important Things:
-We are an INTERNET RELATIONSHIP
-We've met once and couldn't be happier with what we saw
-We are both 17 if this helps
And, you can guarantee a rating if you give me your honest opinion. I've just been crying for days and I could use some help:(
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
talking over the internet you can be someone your not,you can say things to someone and not truly mean it as your not face to face,if you love this man and he feels the same then you should really tell him,face to face,that way you will see his reaction if he agrees and he looks sincere then go for it,if you both still have doubts that its not gonna work and you feel you cant just be friends tell him that,whats the use of prolonging the agony of wanting something that you know deep down isnt going to work,if its what you want then fight for it if its not what you want and i mean truly what you want then you have to move on...it will be hard as you love him but you will have to make a decision, anyway goodluck :)
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Stop talking to him.
Please.
He isn't a friend.
This guy is a control freak. Just in case you haven't gotten that lets stick a big label on him that read 'Control Freak'.
Control Freak is manipulating you. Control Freak is making you work, and work hard, to be with him while doing next to nothing himself. Control Freak is walking away whenever things don't go exactly the way he wants them too. Control Freak knows that his position, as this guy that you love who is miles away, gives him boundless power over you, and he likes it. Control Freak doesn’t need to deal with you respectfully or address the pain he causes you; the cyber world filters it for him, allowing him to treat you as little more then text on a screen that he can’t pick up and drop again without any remorse.
The reason you aren’t okay with this, is because this is NOT OKAY. If he was doing this in person it would be just as not okay.
Tell him you aren't ready to be friends, or better yet, that you don't want to be his friend. Because you don't and you aren't. Crying for days is a good sign of not being ready or willing to put up with his bullshit right now.
Loving him, but recognizing his failures and how negative the relationship is for you, is the first step in getting over a guy. The second step is getting and keeping some distance.
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I really think you need to get a life closer to home. I'm not saying this to be mean or anything
but at your age you need to be social and interact with guys near to you. You need to have a date to the dance. Can't happen with a long distance internet romance.
Communication and talking are a very important part of a relationship. But that isn't all there is to it. You have the communication but little else. Even though you have met you don't truly know a person unless you spend time with them. As you may know a person can write a good life but not necessarily live one.
Now I'm not saying he isn't a great guy. He may very well be. But you need to see each other as
internet friends and get a real life going outside
of the computer. You can't live in this little
cyber world no matter how great it is.
None of this needs to be the end of the world.
Right now its all a fantasy though. Could you meet someday and live happily ever after? Maybe. Until
someone is ready to change locations on a maybe though, get out there and find someone close you can do things with. :)
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Just because you are an internet relationship doesn't mean it can't work out,I think you will need some time apart from him before deciding whether you will want to be friends with him or not right now you're very hurt,need some space to get things sorted out,figure out where you want things to lead to he has to be willing to respect your decision if he really likes you that much.
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