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DOES hE REAlly likE ME !?
well thers this guy ive liked for about 3 years now we started out flirting alot, then last year he actually asked me Out & we were togeather for like 1 day then he broke up with me at school with a stupid little note. but then ever since then all last skool year he would tell his friends that he liked me sooo much & that i was beautiful. & he would send me texts saying that he lliked me again & saying really sweet things. now this year, i think he likes me but its that he'l be sweet one day then he'l talk about another girl the next day. he constantly staring at me. & he textd me yesterday "i think one day we r gonna have sex" & he also told me tht he always wanted to lose his virginity with me & he regrets loosing it to some other girl.. im really confused because i LOVE this guy. i need help on wether he likes me or if he just wants sex.. also i want to know if thiers any thing i should do to attract him a littile more :) pls helpp <33
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
difficult one. ill try to reverse some stuff i use on girls for you, just keep in mind that its untested.
first some questions:
why did he break up with you before? sounds kind of suspicious to me. Ive seen this happening to guys because the girls were unsure about the guys, usually because they got all clingy or insecure or creepy. in your case I just dont know, most guys wont even consider that before they had sex with the girl. was there maybe another girl, or pressure from his friends or maybe just something because he was immature?
how will he talk about another girl the next day? to you or to his friends?
your guy sounds like he is a little bit of a player. on one hand I think you should be cautious, on the other hand I dont think its bad if a guy is testing his options and I think many good guys do this who are still great and honest boyfriends.
at least he thinks youre hot, so wee, youre hot ; P. You only need to make sure that he also respects you, which he might or might not, but could probably more in the future. Some guys are just players by nature or by some damage they took in the past. and trying to get their love AND respect is just a hurtful waste of time. but for most others I believe is the attraction done mainly by looks and the respect comes mainly from your personality.
attracting him more while getting and maintaining his respect:
flirting is just great. I doubt that there is much more you should do, and I dont want to push you to it because he seems to be good at flirting and it might have more effect on you than on him.
if I would write or say "i think one day we r gonna have sex" to a girl i would do this to a) make her think about having it with me in order to build tension, befriend her with the thought and make sure I dont get interpreted as just a friend b) to test how she reacts, because this likely gives me feedback where i am with her right now.
if a girl would write or say that to me I would answer something like "oh cool, so you finally started saving up money ;) ?" (which you obviously cant write : >)
I think playing hard to get sometimes is an important part of flirting. chasing and being chased builds up tension.
playing hard to get:
this is a powerful way to make him respect/value you.
the more he works to get you the more value he will feel you have. if he thinks he has no chance at all he will get frustrated and give up, but a little bit of this can go a long way. so I think you build his motivation by hinting he has a chance and use it getting him to invest sweat and spirit in you by being challenging. all of this in a fun way.
the other thing its good if he discovers things about your personality which he likes. think about what traits you like in a guy I think many of those go the other way to. I and pretty much every other guy likes in a girl besides looks:
- intelligence
- education
- funny, good spirited
- charming
- that shes on her way, knows what she wants and takes action to get it
- talents, her being good at things
I think you should go out with the guy and see what hes about. dating should come before a relationship because its like a test phase. I would want from him to ask you out, he should be able to do that. i think youll do fine if you hint him a little bit to it.
for example:
"i think one day we r gonna have sex"
"anytime when we are 60 and desperate. but be warned that ill always make you feel guilty afterwards for never asking me out when we were young"
or
"you think too much and ask me out too little"
as i judge your guy he should ask you out after that. if not I would suggest you try this one more time just in case he did not get it, but after that i would categorize him as playing and not expect the slightest thing. But if he does I would say something like: "okay, if you dress up pretty im free on sunday ; )" but very nice and flirty
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It does look like he likes you, and regrets breaking up, but it also looks like he might be a little more interested in sex rather than just going out with you, it's just a little odd that he brings it up specifically. So, if you do end up going out again, make sure you make him wait.
Oh, and for attracting him more? When next he talks to you about sex, wink or say something cute that sends his imagination wild.
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He seems extremely inconsistent, or maybe just confused about how you feel about him. Either way, this guy is playing with you, and you shouldn't trust him unless some time goes by and he proves to you that you can.
If it's any help, most guys that tell you they want sex when you aren't dating or in a relationship, well those guys usually just want sex.
Distancing yourself from this guy probably isn't a bad idea. If you really, however, feel like you want to give him a chance, maybe invite him to hang out with you sometime, or hint that he should ask you. Make it somewhere outdoors, and view his behavior. Don't let him get physical with you or have sex with him just yet. It may seem like a good idea at the time, but you should really make sure that he loves you like you do first.
On what you can do to attract him a little more: it already sounds like you are on his mind enough, just focus your time on yourself until you are sure he is mature enough to handle it.
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