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SHYYYYY around A GUY
ahh! so i have this big problem =(
i get reallly shy around this guy i like.
and its getting worst every day!
ahh. in the beginning it wasnt that bad but now its getting worst and worst. ahh and i hate it. i mean i try to pull myslef together and get a grip and face him but im just too scared to!! why do you think that is?
also i want to be around him but once im there i pretend i dont know him and he wont talk to me either, hes the same as me.
but its weird becasue we used to talk in school a lot and we talk online almost everyday for atleast an hour!
this like almost never happens to me.
well it does everytime its a guy i like before im freinds with him =(( help me to get myself to RELAX and talk to him already!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Talking to boys is pretty easy, once you realize that they are just people, no different from you or your friends. Of course, this can be hard to remember when you've spent all morning obsessing over his cute freckles and writing his name in your notebooks. But think about it: Boys are just kids. So when you see the boy you're crushing on, picture him doing something goofy and kid-like, like shopping for underwear with his mom. That will bring your image of him down to earth, making normal conversation so much easier. If your crush doesn't take the bait and start talking to you, it's time to ask him a question. Questions are excellent talking tools because they pull people into conversation. Just make sure to ask open-ended questions - if you ask something that can be answered with a simple "yes" or "no", there's a risk that your convo will be over in seconds! (For example, "What do you think of dogs for pets?" instead of "Do you have a dog?") You could also try asking him for directions (maybe he'll escort you where you're going), or if he's on the school football team, ask what a defensive quarterback is (say you heard the term on TV). When he answers, be sure to thank him and give him a big smile. When a person is nervous, it's common to just blab and blab for the sake of keeping the chat going. But guys get irritated when girls talk just for the sake of talking. If he barely knows you, he's probably not interested in what your little sister did on the weekend, or what you dreamed about last night. Keep the discussion light and in the present. Also, avoid talking about ex-boyfriends, family or friend problems or anything else that's too heavy or negative. If you two get to know each other better, there's lots of time for sharing secrets then. When talking to a guy, it's always better to be the one to walk away. That way you won't run the risk of going on and on, or blurting out something weird when there's an awkward silence. Even if the convo is going great, leave when it's good and you will leave him wanting more. So after you've chatted for a bit, when it feels like a good point for the conversation to wrap up, say, "It was nice talking to you" and be on your way. If you're just too shy or nervous to pull off talking to your crush, think outside the "one-on-one" idea. Why not plan a girl-guy outing with several of your friends and get someone to ask him along? Go out for pizza, or invite the gang over to your house to play some games. This is better than watching a video, because it will allow you to interact and become more comfortable around him, and that can lead to conversation. Don't expect to become best friends right away, though. Like any good relationship, it will take time to develop. As you spend time with him in small group settings, your nervousness will probably fade. You may even find yourself wondering what caused your jitters in the first place.
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You're probably just physcing yourself out. The longer you wait to talk to him, the more freaked out you're going to be. So just put aside your nerves and just go up and talk to him. Once you talk to him again for the first time it wont be as bad anymore. Good Luck!
- _ - Jasmine _ - _
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It's only getting worse & worse because you're letting it. By not saying anything to him, you're just allowing the situation to deepen. Try saying hi to him in school & then talk more in school like you used to. He might like you too, so he's just as shy but if you break the ice & talk to him more & ask to hang out, things will get better.
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"How did you learn to walk when you were a baby? You fell. But the important thing is that you got back up. " -Lauren Cronin
Do you get the message in that? It means if you ever wanna get anywhere, the only way you'll do it right is if you do it wrong the first time. You're afraid of him thinking you're some loser, aren't you? Well everyone is. And losers are the ones who don't get up after they fall. So what I'm trying to say that if you talk to him- YES, You WILL get scared and you WILL be rejected eventually in the dating world. And that's life! But if you don't jump back into the dating world, you'll never learn to live in it. Does that make sense? Hope so. You're not afraid of HIM rejecting you. It's not the chance of the fact that he won't like you back that bothers you. It's the rejection.
But everyone faces it.
And you'll live on.
So go ahead and talk to him, IMing, email, texting, or even in person. He probably thinks it's weird too that you guys don't talk anymore.
Bottom Line: You're gonna fall. And you're gonna succeed. You don't know if you'll fall or fly with this guy... so you're afraid. But can you name somebody who HASN'T been afraid? Relax! It's life. Everyone does.
I really hope I helped!
I've been there. But you'll see yourself through it.
No worries
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