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humorist-workshop
hey, well.. you said that you'd be willing to help me with my problem, so here it is.
14/f.
mmk, well I knew this kid, who was like my bestestestest friend ever. like, i asked him for help with everythinggg. & he always looked out for me. & then eventually, we dated. for a couple months. then, he broke up with me, but a couple months later, we were best friends again. & it was like we were dating. but we never made it offical. considering, i just had gotten out of a bad relationship at that time, + i wasn't 100 percent sure if i liked him & only him completely.
that all happened in 6th grade. [ i met him in like 4th grade, & we became like best friends at the beginning of 5th grade.]
so anyways, 7th grade rolled around, me & him were still the best of friends. & i was like wow, yano we've been friends so long, most girls i know dont stay that good of friends with guys for so long. so then, at the end of 7th grade, in the summer, well, i have a sliding glasss door in my room, which leads out to my deck, & like, its confusing.. my house is like on a hill, but anyways, its really easy for boys to sneak up there.. & stuff. so i had alot of visiters during that summer, most of the boys that i didn't really care too much about. but then, my best friend [the boy] was like omg your so hot. & i'd so wanna do you. & i was also talking to my old best friend at the time [well she was still my best friend then] & i was like hes tottaly kidding right? & shes like oh yeah deffinitly. so i kinda played along with what he was saying. but then he got all weird. like he was like, do you love me? tell me you love me. & i was like wtf is he high. & he just kept saying stuff like that. so then, he was like ok im comin over. & im like.. its kinda late bud? & he was all like it would be fun. & i was like whoa nooo. & he kept insisting. & like, it wasnt like him, for awhile i didnt even think it was him. so hes like, hayley you said you loved me. & all this stuff like that. & i was like, idno i was starting to get mad. so hes like..whatever i'm coming over."
so he came over alright. & i was like, well you should've known before you walked here, i wasnt going to do that. i'm only 13. i'm not a slut. & all this stuff. eventually, i told him to go home. he ended up being really mad at me. we talked for a couple months longer, & then, that ended that. he like tottaly just stopped talking to me, completely.
& i was like so upset. because i then felt like so wrong & guilty. i mean, i didnt know he was being serious. i never thought, that he actually would have came. i never knew i dont know. so then now, i go to his school. hes in like 5 of my classes. & my lunch period. so i see him alotttt. & he looks at me alot. like alot. but he hasnt talked to me yet, & i've been there for like 2 months. & so, also, some of the kids he hangs out with, like hate me. & stuff. &thats not fair, because he basically twisted the story. saying i liked him & everything.
so, now its basically screwing things up there too. like there like, oh wait.. your that girl?
so, i don't know what to do. am i suppose to go up to him apologize? or should i just forget it?
& its like so confusing. because people though keep walking up to me. & theyll be like, wait you dated him? yeah, he always talks about you, in a good way. so like i don't know. i feel weird going up to him & just being like hey.
what should i do? i cant just forget about him. & i'm always feeling so guilty. how do i make it better? & show him that it wasn't my fault, that i didnt know.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
ok, well for one thing, you have no reason to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong. Like you said, you're 13, not a slut. You had no way of knowing he was serious and I don't blame you for playing along either, I do that with some of my ex's and they seem to enjoy it too.
I think you should go up to him and make an attempt to talk to him about it. Neither of you have really forgotten about it and he may have just felt emmbarrased that it happened or pissed off that things didnt go his way. Regardless, you should try to talk to him civilly about it and if he does lay on the "what do you mean," act then just try to get him to talk things out with you.
If he won't then at the very least you gave it a try. He has 5 classes and a lunch with you so im kinda thinking that he'll have to talk to you eventually.
And as far as him changing up the story, thats crap. If he cant tell it like it happened then he must be either ashamed or embarrased at the way he acted.
I really hope that Ive helped u, and im thoroughly interested in this. If u want to try to explain it further or comment on my suggestion, then just put it in my inbox. Id be more than happy to discuss this more with you.
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If he stopped talking to you that means he only wanted one thing [sex] and because he didnt get it, now he's going to act immature and not talk to you. Guys always take sex seriously...so when a girl talks about it, even a little bit...they expect to get it. You should tell him in person, or in a email/note if you cant directly speak to him. Tell him your sorry if you were sending the wrong signals, that you want to be friends again, etc. I think this whole thing is a misunderstanding, but you should also tell him you dont ever want to be more than friends. && dont feel guilty about it. If you didnt want to thats your choice...you would feel even more guilty if you ended up hooking up with him.
If he completly ignores the fact that your trying to be friends with him again, then forget him because he's a jerk and no matter how nice to you he was before...now hes not so he doesn't deserve you.
I hope this helped, if you need anymore help on this ask me ... :]
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haha wow that really stinks. Pretty much boys are gay :) haah no jk, but umm well i kinda have the same problem b/c this one boy that said he likes me, we only talk on aol, and when we see eachother at school we just ignore eachother...and idk its just weird. but i would say don't forget about him, and i know its hard but just be like hey...and kinda small talk with him for a while to try to build that FRIEND relationship up again. You guys were friend for soo long so don't ruin that relationship. But just try to talk to him. but don't apologize b/c you didn't do anything wrong, he should be the one that says sorry. But if that whole situation does come up, don't apologize, jsut be like hey i didn't know you actually liked me like me. i didn't feel the same way.
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You shouldn't feel guilty, because he shouldn't have been mad at you for not allowing him to come into your house, late, and trying to do something that he shouldn't have. So honestly, you have no reason to feel bad -- you did the right thing.
People change, and I think he's one of those people, and he's changed into a jerk, really. I'm sorry to be so blunt, however, if he really liked you and cared about you -- he wouldn't be mad about that night and he would still be talking to you.
I think you should move on, and let this guy go. He doesn't sound like the good guy type, who is worth waiting for to change. And you can't spend your life waiting for that to happen, because it may never.
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