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Friends think theyre fat
(13/F)
most of my friends think that theyre fat and have very very low self esteem. they arent fat, but they are a little chubby and if they loose like five pounds i think they will feel better about themselves. i have never told any of them this. they starve themselves and skip means until me and my other friends convince them its how eating disorders start and they need to eat. if they excersized a little like dancing every weekend or somthing im sure theyd be fine. they eat an average amount of food. how can i help them lose the weight without damaging their self esteem? and howw can i help them feel better about themselves? and feel loved and that they dont need to change anything about themselves? should i just get them active? like all go to a dance class or somthing? we are all AMAZING dancers so anything involving dancing they would be very eager to do. i just want them to be content with who they are. and understand that nobody thinks of them differently because of their weight but also if it bothers them i want them to know im here to help them
any ideas? thank you soooo much!
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I know how you feel. My friends are not even chubby and they call themselves fat. But, anyway, you should bring it up so it diesn't seem like you trying to get them to lose weight. Be like "hey, they have sign ups for a new dance class. I want to sign up, but I don't want to do it alone." or maybe something like this "I was thinking about walking home from school today, you guys want to come with me?" Get them active without them thinking it. Give them compliments randomly. In school when you see them just say something like "hey, I really like you outfit today" or "You hair looks wicked good". Make them think to thierself "Maybe I'm not really that bad looking". Just a few suggestions here. I hope I helped. If you have any more questions you can feel free to ask me. =]
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Tell them if they really don't like the way they look then they should lose weight. The healthy way. Starving themselves & exercising like it's a necessity for breathing isn't the way. Let them know exercise is good, but to still eat & be healthy. Tell them to eat healthy food. Do not eat before they go to bed. And invite them over for little dance parties at your house.
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First, you definitely should talk to them. And I mean more than just saying, "You're not fat." Tell them that skipping meals makes you gain even MORE weight. It really does, because the weight you lose form not eating for a week, you usually gain bakc in the next few weeks. Actually, exercise is the most effective way to lose weight.
Dancing would be a fun way to get in shape! There are many classes you can sign up for, some at night, some on weekends. Here's an amazing workout program thats been around since the 80's and still is around today. It's called Jazzercise. It is dancing to modern music:
Website:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Of course, many of these classes cost money so if you don't think you can afford them, you can start your own class! Try this- every Saturday, or Sunday, or Friday night, whenever is good for you, invite your friends over for a "dance party." You can all bring your favorite songs to dance to and just have fun working out. Clear a room in your house where you could dance. Also, to encourage your friends to eat, provide healthy, low calorie snacks. Here are some good snacks you can offer them or put out when they're over: Quakers Granola Bars, Quakers Rice Snacks, Pretzels, Apples, Bananas, Yogurt, etc. I really reccomend Quakers Rice Snacks because they're like 60 calories for 10 rice cakes and they come in flavors like Caramel, Cheese, Chocolate, Kettle Corn, and Barbeque.
Also make sure you're supporting your friends. I have this problem with some of my friends too. They get very nervous when there's a cookie in front of them and they start saying, "I can't eat this...I'll get fat." so what I do, is I eat WITH them! It will make them feel better about eating, if you always eat with them. (To show them that you're not afraid to eat.) Also you could say things like, "It's just a cookie, don't worry about it. You can work it off at our next dance party."
Or, if they're scared to eat, say, "Did you know you burn 1000 calories every day just by BREATHING?" It's true! You really do! You also burn about 70 calories making your bed. And up to 300 calories just walking to classes. Telling them things like this, might help them to feel better about eating. Keep up the great work. :]
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Try joining a gym together, or since you like to dance, take dancing lessons together. Both would be a good way to stay fit together and have a good time.
As for the self esteem, that is something they have to want to make better for themselves. You can help by telling them how great they look and such as that.
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Ha, my friend wanted to do the same to me. I have a very low self esteem and I'm a very negative person and she wanted to help me. She exercised with me, ate healthy with me, and was just there to give me the support I needed, and I'm sure that's what your friends need. Try convincing them that you`ll always be there, and I`m sure they'll feel better.
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