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getting through to my best friend.
over the weekend my best friend and i had the hugest fight we ever had, and weve been friends for 7 years now and i love her to death, but im tired of her taking advantage of me and taking me for granted. if im her BEST friend she should treat me the BEST. and she doesnt, so we made up at school today, but over the phone shes blowing me off again.. how do i get her to understand how selfish she is with out upsetting her *she upsets real easily*
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Hey, I had/have a friend just like this. We were friends for the same amount of time but she was never truly a "best friend" especially comparing to all my new friends. If she doesn't understand that she's taking advantage of you than that's wrong and you two need a break. It's not right that you're probably the one to always apologize. I'm not saying you'll never be friends again but you have to take a break because it sounds like you got too close. She will see how much she needs you and your friendship, which should then be back to normal. I really hope this helped and good luck! =)
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EDITEDITEDIT
OH WOW IM REALLY HURT...NOT.you dont personally know me for me to bring out the worst in you your just mad because my advice was truth ful and didnt baby you. im just being honest and if you dont like it turn your head inthe other direction....when you ask for advice you set your self up for harsh advice im not sugar coder or a yes man. but hey im talking from experience and sometimes friendships arent meant to last and dont.
shes not a friend and she obviously doesnt want to be friends. so its probably best for both of you that you separate. sometimes things arent meant to be but then again if your calling your so called friend selfish it doesnt seem like your all that good of a friend either maybe there are things about you that shed like to change as wel. or maybe youve just both changed and dont click anymore. it doesnt necessarily mean that your a bad person or that she a bad person. you say that she upsets real easily but sometimes some people bring out the worst in others. maybe she doesnt consider you her bestfriend. you say youve been friends for seven years but how close were you during that time it might seem harsh but take into consideration how close you were.were you inseprateable or joint at the hip or did you just see eachother in the same class. reevaluate yourself aswell you cant put the full blame on her. im not being mean but i doubt your perfect if you are thats extremly rare and deserve a prize.it sounds like she doesnt want to be friends ....people change and grow apart...not really a bad thing or make either person bad but it happen..and your more then likely going to have to move on. if your so much better then her )because it sounds like your putting yourself on a pedistool..sorry it just seems like your laying all the blame on her and taking no fault whatsoever) and if she so horrible then why do you want to be friends with her. two negatives dont make a positive and you obviously dont make eachother feel positive.so your probably better off. just chuck it off as a loss so you both can move on to better things.
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im sure you get upset when she blow you off and it don't seem like she care how mad you get.jus do the same to her, blow her off and when she get pissed you could tell her "now you know wat it feels like,it feels crappy don't it and you don't like it so don't do it to me"and if that upsets her more jus give her a while to cool off and to think about how right you are
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she's not your friend. a best friend doesn't take advantage of you, hell, a FRIEND isn't suppose to take advantage of you. i think maybe you should be stand offish for a little just to like for some breathin room. then maybe talk to her about it and if she doesn't change her ways, then sweetie, it's time to let go because you deserve better than that and you know it
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A best friend has a duty, of sorts. They should listen to you and respect you and your feelings. ALWAYS.
She needs to never take advantage of you or take you for granted. She needs to realize how lucky she is to have a TRUE best friend. They are hard to come by, believe it or don't.
As to getting her to understand your side without upsetting her, I don't think there is much of a way around that if she is insensitive enough to get so upset over you telling her how you feel. The best thing you can do is point out the issues and hope she opens her eyes. Only she can change her behavior.
My advice? Tell her how you feel. Be straight up honest with her. Before you even start, tell her you have something important to say, and you would like to have the respect of her listening and not saying anything until you have said your piece. Get it all out on the table. If she doesn't like how you feel, that's really her own too bad. At least you may feel better for getting it off of your chest.
The best way to do this is in person, outside of school. Meet somewhere private, such as one another's house.
Stick to your guns. Don't let her walk on you like that. You aren't a rug meant for feet wiping. Best friend or not.
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