Question Posted Thursday December 28 2006, 12:11 am
my boyfriend of 5 months is rather nosy. ive never been the type of person to share my problems with the world, i just keep that stuff to myself. ive told him this. however if im having a bad night or something he'll keep on and on and on asking me whats wrong until i tell him. i know its just because he cares, but even if i say "id rather not say" or something, he gives me the whole "but you can tell me anything" or "you promised you wouldnt keep stuff from me". same with if i start laughing about something randomly [i do that often cuz i think about funny stuff] or anything like that. basically just anything thats in my head that i dont wanna spill. i realize that its not really a big deal to tell him, but if i dont he gets mad/upset at me for it, and im finally getting to the point where i dont let people walk all over me anymore, but i feel like when i give in and tell him whatever i dont want to, im just letting it happen again. advice please? 16.f
But you should tell him stuff because he doesn't feel like you trust him. You really need to talk to him. If you are having a bad night, just tell him that and if he asks why. Like a friend is mad at you.
Just tell him that and say nothing more. He just wants to know at least something that's wrong with you, he wants to help you- give advice and be there for you. So try to be a little more open.
It would be best to tell him that you are trying to be open if you haven't and that you really don't share problems with people.
If you don't tell him stuff, he might worry and he doesn't want secrets, you know? Even though sometimes it's not a big of a deal and you don't want to say anything. Just let him know something so he doesn't constantly ask. [ queenhearts's advice column | Ask queenhearts A Question ]
Ahnee answered Thursday December 28 2006, 1:53 am: haha i feel like i wrote that...my bf is the same way. i know it kind of sucks because some things you just want to keep in your own head but he probably just doesn't like things being kept from him in general. you have to explain to him that some things you just want to deal with by yourself in your own mind and if you need help getting through it you'll let him know and that you trust him. as for the funny things, i haven't really solved that one yet either. [ Ahnee's advice column | Ask Ahnee A Question ]
ductape_n_roses answered Thursday December 28 2006, 1:46 am: Well,he just cares about you a lot and you should just tell him what you're laughing at even if it's really stupid or not funny at all. If you're having a bad day and don't want to tell him, tell him that this is really personal and you don't feel comfortable sharing it with ANYONE. He's going to understand that he has to give you some space for privacy too so if it gets worse, just tell him that you want to keep some things to yourself and you don't appriciate it when he tries to plow through every part of your life [ ductape_n_roses's advice column | Ask ductape_n_roses A Question ]
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