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my best friend
my best friend is really starting to bother me. She doesn't respect personal boundaries, like she's ALWAYS using my laptop at school when i ask her not to or taking pictures on my phone. IT really bothers me because i have some personal stuff on there. The problem is that I don't want to talk to her about it because 1. she's gonna think i have like weird stuff on my computer, which i don't, just private writing and pictures, and 2. she's gonna think i'm overreacting and no fun. my family has a lot more money than hers so I feel bad not letting her always use my stuff.
also, I'm feeling kind of lonely, because when it's just us, we have SO much fun, but at school she'll kind of subtly walk away from me to talk to other people and i think maybe she feels that i'm bringing her popularity level down or something, i'm not as outgoing as her and don't have as many friends.
Also, she's always asking me weird big favors, and always asks to have my mom bring us to a mall that's like 30 minutes away. her parents rarely drive, and it bothers me that she takes advantage like that.
please help, i don't know what to do and I REAlly don't want to lose her as a friend!
Thanks
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
That's a really very common problem among friends. Your friend is a type of girl who's like totally into the 'fun' area of life. And, I hope you know, when she does things like doing your laptop and all, she is not trying to invade your privacy or something, but is just trying to be friendly adn funny! And she does all this because she doesn't know! Really. Sometimes people have a tendency to 'irritate' without intending to.
Try to tell her all this in a friendly manner. I mean, its not really necessary to be rude in order to get things done. You can ask her politely.
If you want to be a bit more sporting (this is a trick I just came up with - but I don't think it will work for long - but you can start with it and later tell her seriously - and politely) - you can just you know kind of friendly blackmail or teasing(don't take a topic which hurts the person or else your friendship will suffer) - you can then say that if you stop doing all that I'll stop teasing you! Remember the topic needs to be very casual.
And then, I understand you might feel a bit neglected in school when your friend goes away. But, you must understand that even she have friends who she would want to spend time with. SHe may not really think that you are 'bringing her popularity level down'. The solution is that loosen a bit around her (I mean don't be too possessive about her. The more you think about it, the more it'll get into your head and the more it'll trouble you. This is a very important concept: "Don't let others rule YOUR life. Be your own pilot.") I mean you can make new friends, enjoy yourself...And then you'll find that life is fun! And the 'fun' factor is not just limited to spending some quality time with your best friend. Once you do this - you let positive thoughts enter your mind -don't spend time pestering about pre-acquired conceptions, trust me, you will relish time with your best friend even more!
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It sounds like you don't know if you wanna be friends with herr.. and i can see why. Talk to her- who cares if you're not "fun" at least you're letting out your feelings. Tell her that you think it's rudee- and say like there's nothing personal.. just ask! Tell her maybe you should consider making new friends, and if she's worth it she'll still be your best friend.
*Hope I Helped*
xoxoxoxoxoxo<33
&&Good Luckk =]
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