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my ex best friend is being a bitch
Hey my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and my ex best friend is being a total bitch right now.I thought I could trust her with one of my deep dark secrets that i've never told anyone not even my mom and now it's going around school and everyone is finding out that my dad molested me when I was 6 and now she's calling me a 6 year old pervert and the other day she called me a bitch,slut,and a whore.I thought i could trust her since we've been best friends since the 5th grade and we are both in the 11th grade.I've been there for her for everything that's happened to her in her life like the time she got pregnant at 14 years old i was there for her.I even asked my parents if she could move in with us for a couple of months untill she got her own place and now i can't even trust her with a secret like this that was why i didn't tell anyone i just needed somebody to talk to about it and now i don't have anybody i can trust what should I do?
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OMG! i cannot believe she would do that i feel so badl. Anyway by her doing that she is the one that looks bad not you. The fact that she would betray you like that makes her unatractive. People are gonna start feeling bad for you and start thinking she is a snot. And what happened in you past is no reason for people to think you a perv. You couldn't contol those things. That is totally wrond of her. No matter what you can't start telling her secrets though, even if you want to. Then you will be just as bad as her. If you act like it doesn't bother you she will stop, and if you act like it doesn't bother you other people will think it is a lie. Just b/c you haven't told any of her dirty secrets that makes you a much better person
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Well, she has her own set of problems right there.
One thing to remember is to never ever respond to those little gossip going around with snappy replies. Try to ignore them as much as you can and try to show no emotions or effects to their stupid remarks at you. At all costs, do not try to criticize them back b/c they will hold onto that, twisted in a sick way and use it against you. If you have the strongest urge to reply back to them, try and say "If you truly feel better laughing at the suffering of another, go ahead and laugh but you haven't accomplished anything but to make a fool out of yourself" or somethinglike that in your own words.
It's really sad how people these days are very hard to trust and they can't keep a secret for their lives. It's really hard to find that one true person that you can always trust and be with (friend way) forever. We would be lucky if we even found a person like that in life.
This girl is a total bitch and you should disregard whatever she says because -- even though it may not seem like it now-- she is the one at fault. She is the person that is making a total ass out of herself. She is the person that takes joy in bringing other people down.
If you really hate her and you have no intentions of being friends with her ever again and you don't really care about being the center of the drama, then reply to anyone who bothers you with "At least I'm not the one that got pregnant"
I don't suggest it but it just came to my mind and I had the biggest urgbe to type that down ^^
And as for dealing with her, write down something that mentions
-your long friendship
-how you've kept your deal to not spread around her secrets
-how much she's hurt you
-how this is effecting you
-how you've always been there for her and never did anything like this to harm her intentionaly
-and all about her pregnancy in very very very percise details.
Basically, make her feel guilty and make sure that you write this when you're calm and re read it several times before you give it to her. You don't want to get angry or sad or anything and sound like a total bitch or a whiney ass.
Good luck with this!!! and if you really need someone to talk to , IM me at r0ck0nl0ser
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This is tough...
Its hard to put your trust in someone and then have them throw that trust back in your face. It makes you feel like you cannot trust anyone, which isn't true. She's hurt you, this friend, and you have every right to feel hurt and angry, etc.
Do you have someone to go to at school, I mean like a counselor or school psych? It may sound weird, but my school psych is one of my closest friends. The reason for this is because I've spent a few years battling my own demons, and she made the fight a little more bareable. This is a difficult time you are going through here, and the best thing (and about the only thing)you can do, short of changing schools, is let it all pass.
It will pass, it will just take some time...when people come up to you and try to provoke you, just ignore them. Don't get mad, don't get upset, because that's what they want. Don't give that to them. Don't let them hurt you, because once they see how unffected you are, and how you don't care (even though you really do) they'll stop.
As for you your friend, forget her. Feel the hurt, experience the pain for a few minutes and then let it go. Its over, its done with. My grandpa once told me that "You can't worry about things that you have no control over." Its easier said than done, but its true. Forget your friend, and dont even refer to her that way anymore, because in order to do such a terrible thng, she was never your friend to begin with...
Luv,
--Star
(Wanna talk more? E-mail me at cardenb@countryday.net!)
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