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Boyfriend problems...
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I've been dating this guy for about five months now. I think we're perfect together & everytime I'm with him, he makes me the happiest girlfriend alive. He's like a part of my life & I really don't know what would happen if he weren't to be in my life anymore.
With that, we have this BIG disagreement.
He smokes weed, and I think it's REALLY gross. Ever since he met me, he has cut down, because he hangs out with me a lot, and he won't do it around me. He smoked weed for like three years before he met me, so it's not like he just recently started. I know weed isn't addicting, the only reason he likes it is because it's just nice to have every once in awhile.
I don't like weed because I just don't like how weird he acts when he's on it, it just scares me. He also says mean things about me, [I found his tape recorder & he ended up recording an entire conversation with his roommate talking about how unhappy he is with me!]
He said he's not willing to change & weed has been around a lot longer then me.
I'm lost, what should I do??
Thank you!
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Are you kidding me? Who are you to judge me and whether I have been in love or not? You don't idiot. "Oh I can't live without him" do you know how third grade that is? You CAN live without him, and it doesn't matter what your life is like, whose died and if you are in some foster home, you get heart broken, and you go through the same pain that everyone else does.
It just so happens that I have been in a serious relationship, it went for 3 years and guess what? We broke up! And guess what else? I'm still alive! I'm still happy, and I know that I can live without him.
If you think that you can stop him from doing pot, you have fun with that, but let me tell you, the chances are too slim to try. It's not worth it. So before you go off and assume that I've never been with someone, make sure you know that. So lets compare, 3 years-5 months. Hmm, no way you'll never survive without this guy after 5 months...
Seriously, get over yourself.
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Anything can be addicting, so therefore, he is. I realize you think it's gross, and you don't want him to do it, but he's gonna do it anyways. He's not gonna stop just because you say so. I know you don't like how he acts, because when people are high, they can be a little weird, or say dumb stuff, but they don't even know what's going on. So don't mind him when he's like that. He's not in a right state of mind. For the recorder thing, I'd seriously talk to him about that, because that's wrong. If he continues to be rude about it, I'd just fuck it. Because a guy who won't treat you good over a damn plant, is retarded.
I think you're a bit more important than a plant.
I hope I helped you!
♥TiNA
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The fact that he's not willing to quit the weed suggests he is in fact addicted to it! There is such a thing as a psychological addiction to weed. The worrying thing is that the full affects of weed is still unknown and is still being researched. For example, I recently read an article that states that research has shown that cannabis can cause Schizophrenia in young people!
There are harmful effects to smoking weed. Also, people who tend to smoke weed do tend to go on to take harder drugs as the buzz of weed starts to fade and they get immune to it. So I completely agree with you hating weed! I do too! I've seen people get addicted to it and move onto harder stuff.
All behaviour altering drugs are a big NO NO!
Try showing your boyfriend the dangers of smoking weed and talk to him seriously about it and tell him how he acts differently when he smokes. If he's hell bent onnot changing, then ditch him! He should be willing to compromise for you. Yes, granted he doesn't smoke in front of you, but if he's mean to you and scares when he's under the influence of weed then that's a big problem.
Also, how did he justify making a tape where he disses you!? Why do you want to stay with someone like that? You're in danger of falling in a rut and having your self-esteem trampled if you continue to be with someone who talks behind your back like that. And for him to say weed's been around longer than you shows how messed up his priorities are! It sows he's weak and addicted as he'd be willing to choose weed over you.
Set him a challenge to see if he can go without smoking weed for 1 month. I'll shocked if he lasts a week.
I wish you all the best and hope you make the right choice for you!
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You wont like this answer, but its true. You can't change him & he shouldn't have to change for you. You're not his parents, you're the girlfriend. He likes it, when people like weed [I grew up with a brother who liked weed & I know many people who still do.] they 99.9% of the time will not change for anybody. You already told him how you felt, and Thats all you can really do. Now you leave it up to him, he either stops or doesn't. If you don't like it that much, its time to call it off.
He's choosing weed over you, and I know you noticed it.
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when you love someone, you have to love EVERYTHING about them- including his love of weed. Dont try and change somebody, it will always backfire and more then not, on the person trying to change the other person.
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