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hard to get How do you play hard to get without making you seem "too hard to get"?
[ ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
By not playing hard to get. All it does is complicate things, and men are really, really simple by nature (and I'm a guy saying this lol). Its like giving a Rubiks cube to a chimpanzee.
Remember one thing that many woman seem to forget - Playing hard to get can be fun, erotic, or whatever, IF THE GUY KNOWS WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON. If a guy takes playing hard to get as being seriously hard to get, you just shot yourself in the foot and lost that guy. There is a reason that so many women gripe about slutty women getting all the guys...because they do. Men are VERY literal creatures, playing hard to get can backfire as you send mixed signals - most guys will gravitate towards the obvious when they can. This doesnt mean be a slut, just be open and honest.
The only thing guys like about "the chase" is being done with the chase. Almost every guy I know (myself included) despises mind games and women playing hard to get so much, that they will lose interest most of the time with this "hard to get" game and move on. Men and Woman want basically the same things - sex, relationships, pie (everyone loves pie)...but guys aren't going to waste their time playing games. If the majority of men DID like the chase, for the sake of the chase itself, prostitution wouldn't be so wisespread - they'd be out chasing woman with little or no chance of success, instead of supporting the worlds oldest profession.
My advice is to not even play hard to get in the first place. Just do what you want to do, have sex when you want to, date when you want to. Be honest with guys, tell them how you feel. If a guy trusts you, he'll respect your wishes (most of the time)...but often as not, start playing games and they'll look for love elsewhere. I know I do, when the games start. ]
Respect yourself... and make it obvious that you respect yourself. Show him/her that you aren't easy, but you have interest in him/her. Most people dont like to date people that don't show interest in them. ]
You don't have to play hard to get, but a little challenge can be arousing. My advice is to stick to being not too easy to get. Keep the focus on giving a little and not a lot away and keep the interest flowing slowly. Playing too hard to get can easily backfire because of the miscommunication. You don't need to be deceptive, but you do need to go slow and maintain a little mystery for a while. ]
to me, "playing hard to get" these days is just, dont throw your self at him.
be available, but not too available.
dont seem desperate for him.
boys like a chase.
dont kiss them on the first date.
but make them want it.
you know?
but seriously, boys dont like games, so if you dont do it right, your screwed.
so either dont do it at all and be yourself, or risk it and go for it. ]
Not playing the game is the best way to stand out from the crowd. Most of the time, you generally lose.
Playing hard to get, without making it seem like you're playing hard to get - just remain casual, indfferent etc. ]
As a guy I agree wholeheartedly with the answer below. Sure, there will be some guys who get a thrill out of the extra chase or whatever... but then there are the rest of us that figure its time we move on (or worse, realise the girl is playing games and develop a real dislike towards her). Life would be so much easier and more pleasant if people didnt play games with one another imo.
Anyway, I definately agree with below, be yourself in all respects. Then the guy also knows what he is getting... improves the chances of the relationship working if you ask me. ]
Here's some advice... don't. It's kind of stupid. I'm friends with a lot of guys, and they really don't go for that sort of thing. Actually, they tend to find it really annoying.
So do yourself and them a favour, and don't "play", just be yourself and you'll get a guy worth having! ]
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