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Feeling used, forgotten, and humiliated!!!
17/f
My bf who is 19 lives in another state because he's going to college there. He came back for the summer and we had sex for the first time a few weeks ago. Then I didn't hear from him for a few days. I called his parents and it turned out he'd headed back to college already!!! Why didn't he say goodbye? Why won't he answer his cellphone now? Was he using me? How could he just do this to me after 2 years together? What's going on? Was losing my virginity to him a mistake? I'm sorry there's so many questions I just don't understand!!!! I thought what we had was so real!
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This is one of the bad things in life that happen in life. Some guys do use girls to get what they want and they can be really convincing. It sounds like he was probably using you not that you want to hear that but it sounds like that in this case. If you dont regret having sex with him then it wasnt a mistake. I lost my virginity the same way so its not only you if that helps any.
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To start off, If you wanted sex, he would not have waited 2 years.
Maybe he thinks he messed up during it? Or maybe he scard himself?
Maybe it freaked him out? I'd calm down & A little, theres nothing to much you can do if he wont call you back.
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Well, I don't think he would be using you, cause if he wanted something from you, I don't think he'd stick around for 2 years to get it. But I don't know, they way you said what happened sounds to me like he DID sort of use you. But, no reason to jump to conclusions. Maybe he had to leave early, or he couldn't say goodbye cause it'd be too sad. I'm not too sure.
The next time you talk to him, I would have a serious talk with him and ask him what is going on, because what he did was rude, just leaving without saying goodbye. Especially after what was supposed to be special happened between you two not too long ago. And let him know how you're feeling used and forgotten and humiliated. If he doesn't try and resolve it or explain himself, unless he has good reasons for doing what he did, then I would otherwise dump him. Because everything he did was rude and if it's already starting now, with him in college, it seems like the not picking up the phone and everything's going to continue, and that's not a good relationship at all if he's not willing to put more of an effort toward it. Especially now that he's farther away at college.
As for the losing your virginity to him being a mistake? It could go both ways. I mean, if you really loved him and wanted him to be your first and be special, then no, it wasn't a mistake because that's who you personally wanted it to be with, that was your choice. And also, you didn't know he wasn't going to call or was just going to leave for college or anything, cause I'm sure if you did, you wouldn't have had sex with him.
But, try and talk to him and if it doesn't work, then I say dump the jerk.
I hope I helped.
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