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He hurts himself so I can't.
Alright my situation is kind of long.
and I'm going to start from the beginning.
Me and my boyfriend tyler were dating for about 6 mnths, and me being 15 and him being my first boyfriend I got scared of being tied down and broke things off with him. he took it pretty bad and was crying, and asking why. But after a few weeks he acted like he had a better grasp on it, but I knew it was still killing him inside. Well about 3 weeks ago he told me he had a girlfriend, and that triggered something inside of me. I basically told him I wanted him back, and he just said he didn't know what to do, but he wanted me. Well, he, at this point in time, is my boyfriend.
But I think I saw something I shouldnt've. Cut marks. I guess throughout this whole situation he's been cutting, I got him to kind of talk to me about it but he wouldn't go that far into detail. Now I used to cut, and I know what he's going through,
but my question is how do I approach him about it, what do I say, and how do I tell him to stop?
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Just ask if he wants to go for a walk one day. Go somewhere like a park and tell him you are going to talk about somethings he may not want to discuss but he needs to hear. Then tell him everything! Tell him you broke up with him before because you were afraid of being tied down, and that you'll never do that again. Tell him how you felt when he was going out with that other girl. Tell him how you feel about him cutting himself. Tell him that you will never hurt him again. Tell him while he's hurting himself, it's killing you. And finally tell him you know what it's like to be a cutter, and you will be there for him while he gets help.
Hope I helped.
~~~~~~~~hailey~~~~~~~
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get him professional help. there is some you can do, but it is hard for them to stop, so you really need somebody who knows what theyre talking about. it sucks that hes doing this but youhavet o let him know its serious, and that you'll be there for him.
and for future reference, dont toy with guys. they have feelings too. take em or leave em.
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You need to show him that you're always there for him and that he has someone to talk to about his feeling (even if it's about you) instead of keeping in bottled inside and self harming.
He'll probably not want to listen to this and wouldn't want to but jsut bug him about it. Simple cuts can lead to deeper ones. I mean a simple cut may relieve him at first but as he goes deeper into the self harming thing, a deeper cut may be needed to relieve hiis emotions and pain inside. And if he cuts an artery or vein, he could easily die.
Tell him strongly that you want him to stop and you don't want to be shut out from his problems and that you want to help him. You want to try and solve his problems and you want him to turn to you instead of the blade or whatever he's using to cut with. Give him a rubberband (a thick, loose one) and tell him to wear it on his wrist. And whenever he feels like he has the urge to cut, tell him to just pull the rubber band (I know, not a fun way to solve it but better than cutting) and/or give him something like a small necklace or a bracelete (you made from strings (like for cross stitching)) so he can always have it around him and remind him that you're there to help him.
Just let him know that you're there to help him , listen and solve his problems, and that none of thses stuff will leak out. And if he doesn't stop, (If it escelates to a worse cutting level) tell him that you are gonna have to tell someone. That you'd rather lose the friendship instead of the friend
**Emm[y].
p.s. don't think that I'm saying all this because I don't know what "cutters" go through (yuck, i hate labeling.) because i was one myself and luckily my friends got me to stop before i killed myself
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tell him how you went through the same thing and that its not a good thing to do and to plz stop for u if he does love you he will.
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