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first love
well my ex, who was my first kiss, and first boyfriend, and first real love.. we went out for 4 1/2 months... which isnt really that long, but it was the most wonderfull time of my life.... well we broke up and that was about 6 months ago, but i still like him, but my BEST friend likes him and he likes her... yes my BEST friend.. and they are probably going to go out..... i just want to know how to be ok with it, and how to finally let my first love go??
any advise will help right now
tthanx
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That's tough & to me it doesn't seem very fair for your friend to do that. I mean, you're not going out anymore, but out of respect you should never go out with a best friend's ex. Especially if that friend is still not completely over him & fine with it. Anyways, it is tough to let something like that go because he was your first for a lot of things. But the only thing I can suggest is focusing on another guy or picking up a hobby or job to keep you busy. It doesn't seem like it's the best solution, but it does help. Don't associate too much with your ex & just try not to be reminded of the good times. I am not suggesting to forget them, just don't bring them up all the time because it'll be harder to move on. Overtime, you will grow apart from him. It may take weeks or even months, but try not to be surrounded him by too much. & time will heal everything.
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Of course you're going to be somewhat attached to this guy, you gave your first kiss and your heart to him.
There really isn't a way to be okay with it if you know in your heart and in your head that you're not.
Your best friend should be more caring, and ask you if it's okay with you, and you should return the favor and be honest with her.
But if you truely want to get over it,
just think like this, that you love to see your friends happy. You like to see them together.
I'm sorry
goodluck,hun
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Not knowing the circumstances of the breakup makes answering this question difficult. It would help if you added that information in. From what you've given though, I can tell you this: a lot of people don't ever completely get over people that they loved. As dismal as that makes the future sound,
it's meant to cheer you up. You're not alone. Not even close. Sometimes it's nice to know that so many other people go through the exact same thing that you are going through.
There is something that you can do to help yourself out a little in your particular situation. Talk to your best friend about everything. You're best friends after all right? It may be hard to get the conversation started, but if you let her know what you're feeling (in a nonconfrontational way) it'll either persuade her not to date your ex, or it will make you feel better. How will it make you feel better? Well, you'll get a better understanding for her side of the story and things might make a little more sense.
My guess is that you're young, meaning still in middle or high school. After both of you get everything out, try talking your friend out of dating your ex if she hasn't already decided so. Tell her that it would put a strain on your friendship. Friends will always be there for you and are, in most cases, more important than any relationship you can ever have. Who is going to be there for her when her relationships go bad? You. Very few middle to high school relationships last. Ask her if it's worth it to mess up your friendship for some guy that's just going to break her heart anyway. If it really was meant to be and not just a passing fling, they can get together a little later in life once you've come to terms with your own breakup with him. It would be the respectful, nice, and right thing to do for you and your friendship.
If she gets defensive or angry just end the conversation. She'll at least think about what you had to say and will make her own decision anyway. Just make sure that you stay calm and don't accuse her of anything. It should go smoothly and if it doesn't, then just hold onto the fact that if she does date them they're going to break up anyways. You can have a little laugh to yourself when they do. If it gets way too stressful for you, and you find it hard to take it with humor or a carefree attitude, maybe it's time to end your frienship with her. She needs to be there for you when you need her and right now, she really isn't.
I hope I helped you in some way and good luck. I hope that everything turns out well for you. :)
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