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what's going on?
Ok, this might be long so I'm sorry hehe. Im 15 and female and have been with my boyfriend for a year. When we first got toegther he was really romantic and sweet (imporant thing for me) and it was great and we were getting on really well. Now it seems as if he couldn't care less about us. We only see each other twice a week...if that. Everytime he leave to go home I end up in tears because i feel like things are beyond repair. He often makes little comments which make me feel like crap, he also brags a lot which make me feel worse because he has a lot of money and gets a lot of things. He spends a lot of time with his mates and has said in the past that they come before me, which is fair enough. He doesnt very often make the effort to see me so I'm always changing what I'm doing for him. All the romantic stuff is gone, and I guess I just feel like he would rather be with someone else. I havent told him any of this because in the past if I have had a problem with him he acts like he is perfect and thats its my fault and then makes me feel like im some kind of paranoid-weird girlfriend. I want this to all work out because I love him so much and I know deep down he loves me too. But if he doesnt start showing that he cares then I'm going to have to let go..... if i can that is because its failed int he past.... any advice is very much appriciated! thank you! :)
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Hey babes, well this is a problem i can relate to. I was with my boyfriend for nearly 3 years and like your boyfriend he started treating me like crap, my self-esteem went down hill and i was constantly crying. I know you love him so much and probably can't see your life without him but trust me waiting for him to return your love is hopeless. im sorry to say it but it's true. You need someone who thinks your the most beautiful girl in the world even if you just got out of bed and your make-up is a mess. You have been with this guy for a year and you should be able to tell him how you feel, and his friends should NOT come before you, not this far into a relationship. I know it's going to hurt and you will feel like there is no one else for you in the world but there is. The longer you leave it the harder it will be, so look at it like this, you can either stay with him and be unhappy for a long time or end thing's and let the heeling process begin. So please darling leave him, i put up with mine like that for a whole year and it nearly destroyed me, im goin on 4 weeks now and it still hurts but im feelin more confident and happy with each day. You deserve to be treated like a goddess not like you don't matter. You will make it through babes i promise. love jem xxxxxxxx
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wow. sounds like a real prick. why don't you get rid of him. seriously, he makes you feel terrible and fret on the internet. thats pretty fucked up. find some dude that'll treat you good and stick with him.
-gunner
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OK you need to plan out what you are about to say to him.Tell him that your relationship is going down and that you love him very much and that you want this to work.Ask him if he still loves you and all.Tell him about the comments he makes that piss you off and that if he aint got nothing nice to say then dont say nothing.Tell him to stop denying things if he does and if it dont work out,dump him before he dumps you.Hes not the last guy youll meet.There are pleanty of guys that are dying for a girl like you.He needs to know that your not just any girl for him to treat you like that.
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If you want my honest opinion, i dont really think you should be with this guy even though you love him! He doesnt treat you with the respect you want and deserve! Making you feel bad about yourself is not a good thing for him to do! I have no doubt that you love him and want to be with him but you could find someone a lot better than him that will treat you right! I think that he has crushed your confidence a little, you should not be cryin when he leaves your house, you should be full of happiness! Also, for him to openly say that his friends mean more to him when you have been with him for so long is awful!!
If you do still want to be with him, talk to him about it! tell him how you feel! if he really cares about you he should understand, if he tries to twist things round as though its you that is in the wrong, and make you feel like a nagging gf when you clearly arent, then he isnt worth your time and effort!! Love Emma XXXXXXX
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Well I have been in a situation like this one before but not the same . . . forst of all if you know deep down that oyu really honestly and truly love each other it should be perfect in the end Have you been acting any diferent? if so that might be a problem too there are 2 things that can be weighable here either he is letting go of you which it doesnt seem like or maybe and probgably that he is afraid too. . . you should tell him the exact same thing oyu posted up here . . . he is probably so afriad that if he gets any closer to you that he will lose you and he doesnt want to lose you because it will kill him tell him what you said and how oyu really feel about him and let him know that nothing can come between love. . . hope i helped feel free to ask any mopre questions and tell me how it goes
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what i think you should do is just let it out and tell him how you feel.and if he doesn't care about anything you say you should let him go.because if he isn't paying attention to you and he spends more time with his friends then you,i just think that's not right.a relationship should last forever the romance should never stop.if there's no more romance then what's left in a relationship.if i were you i'd let him go and start over with someone new.and if he doesn't care about how you feel about him then he's not worth it.if you're willing to be romantic and caring for him and he doesn't do the same for you,then break up.because you deserve soo much better then that loser.
hope it works out for you.
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Well, first of all, don't feel like a paranoid girlfriend. You're just a girlfriend who cares alot about her boyfriend and wants everything to work out, no shame in that. But the spark sometimes can tend to go away in a long relationship, especially after a year. He probably feels just fine with everything and stuff, and like he doesn't have to impress you or romanticize you anymore because nothing's new anymore, because when you first start out, it's a new person, new memories, new adventures, everything's exciting. I would try talking to him again about it. Let him know that you feel like he doesn't care and love you anymore and it jsut hurts because you feel like you're making a huge effort, and he's not. Just tell him you're not being paranoid you just care alot because you guys only see eachother twice a week, if that, and you want to spend more time together at least and have some fun and romance. Maybe even suggest going out to dinner or somewhere at a really nice place, and try and get the spice back in your life. And you should tell him, like you said, that if he doesn't start showing that he cares more, then you might not be able to stay with him. And I know it's hard to stay away. I had to make myself back off my boyfriend and stuff and then slowly after awhile, I got over it and didn't care anymore. I also think he should get a wake-up or something, because he is NOT perfect. Nobody is perfect, and he should realize that. And if you do break up with him, who needs a guy who thinks he's perfect anyways? He'll only make you feel worse about yourself, and that's not a good boyfriend. But firstly, like I said, try to talk to him about it and plan a little romantic night together. I hope I helped. <3
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