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I lost complete hope in my life
For starters,I have completely no freinds, and no one to talk to or hang out with .
I left my old school with a low reputation and i was known as a bitch. Guys always play with me and mock me because they think that i am the easy type of girl.
I am totally alone in this life, and my mom never cares or asks because she;s always at work, and my dad is definitely not the type of person to listen and sympathize.
I also play this sport at the club, and i am trying hard to improve and go to championships, but my coach just cares about the people who are real champions, and he just trains me for half and hour or something. I feel like a complete loser.
I even work here on the site, but i have had it from helping people and advising them, its like the only thing that i do. And then when i stopped for a moment, i found out that my own life is messed up and i need advice myself.
I considered committing suicide before, but thats just bullshit. I thought becoming really religious and maybe god would be on my side.
But it didn't actually have a result and nothing happened. I tried just being myself , but i hate who i am . I tried changing, but its not working at all.
I need help because right now i am nothing but a depressed desperate bitch with a screwed up life . I would really love some help.
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so many things i want to talk to you about and help you with but its too long to write down and i have a questions for you so if you can just add me up on my aim or yahoo and well be able to talk and ill be able to help you alot and tell you how to turn things around ok? my yahoo is melodydreams2001@yahoo.com,and aim is skaterbomb13...ok? btw you should never call yourself a bitch ok some girls arent able to stay as strong as others and some girls fall for guys easily and youve seen the messed up part of it is and now you would do it anymore...all you have to do is wait and the rite guy will come to you and hell treat you amazingly as long as you dont throw yourself at him but show that your something worth thrying to get..anyways i hope i get a chance to talk to you...Gods with everyone he never leaves you alone and you have to remeber hes always watching and as long as you know who God is and belive in the right and true religion things will get easier and youll wake up being so happy that your alive and that you have awsome friends and an amazing man! hahha but remeber things take time..be patient everything comes around in the end..peace and good luck hope i talk to you soon
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I just have to say right off the bat- dude, sucide is not the answer. You should never ever ever ever think that ending it all is the only way out, beacuse it's not. Trust me.
It sounds to me like your self esteem is extremely low right now. I think the first thing you should do is try to get that up a bit. I know that not having any friends can be hard but it is possible to get through your school year alone. (you seem like a tough girl, I bet you can do it.) I dunno how much time you have left in school, like if this is your Junior year or senior year or what, but if you are a senior, you can have faith in knwoing that you only have a year left until you can start all over again and try to be a new person, if indeed that is what you want.
Whatever sport you are doing at this club, it sounds to me like you really like it. Have you ever let your coach know that you're feeling neglected? You should let him know that you think you should be treated just like the rest of the people he trains, and that being a champion is important to you, an dthat you know you can do it. If he still negelcts you, I would take up something else (have you ever tried yoga? Or maybe something like boxing or karate. You may make new friends along the way too)
As far as everyone thinking you're a bitch, if you don't like these people then their opnion shouldn't bother you. If it does bother you that much though, simply be a nicer person. I know it may sound a bit difficult, but it gets easier.
I think that's about all the adivce I have for you right now. If things get too bad and you wanna talk to someone, my AIM name is Supergurl5254. I hope I helped.
-Kayla Jay
Oh, I also think that maybe you should talk to your mom, make sure it's at a time thats good for her and let her know how you feel about everything.
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God helps everyone,mabey the religion you chose wasnt the real deal.Learn about the three main religions and then decise.I have a website about my religion called www.freewebs.com/islamteens/ if you want to check it out.Youre going to a new school right?Nows the time to change.Dont be easy to get or everyones gonna talk bad about you.Write on a paper a list of things youre about to change about yourself starting from the new day.Killing yourself will make you lose your life on earth AND afterlife.WOW!Stick more to your education and dont drop down from school for anything.Your education is whatll make youre future different.If you become more religious and nothing changes,bear in mind that this is a test from God,because if you can go through his test,you will be rewarded.Good luck in your decisions
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First all this angst you are feeling is perfectly normal. Your body is going through so many changes all at once and hormones are going wild. It will pass. So, I am so glad you realize that suicide is BS.
Okay, why do you have no friends? If you want to make friends, you first have to be one. Not everyone is going to like you, but I'll bet there are a few out there who would be friends if you tried. Remember that everyone is human and all make mistakes. Friendships need work to keep going. Give people a chance to get close to you. I have a feeling you don't allow people in. Relax a little and see what happens.
If you are at a new school then you get to start over. Try not to be a bitch and be friendly. Even to those who you may not like so much. Soon you will be known as a friendly person.
Guys...well, guys your age are immature little toads so try not to worry much about their opinions. I know you would like to have a boyfriend and all that but you are young yet. I know that isn't something you want to here but it isn't like they are going to come by your house, pick you up, take you out for dinner and spend their money on you. They are simply someone to hold hands with in the halls at school. Really, that isn't dating. So just be as friendly as you can for now and hope they grow up to be decent guys one day. :)
If you enjoy playing whatever game it is you play at the club, concentrate on that. Having fun and enjoying sport. Not everyone is a champion and being one is so unimportant. You need more fun in your life. I have a feeling you are a perfectionist and that is so unnecessary. It doesn't make you a loser by any means. Enjoying life is not losing. The fact that you are upset because you want to be champion takes the fun away.
Working here on the site is a good thing. If you help even one person with a problem in their life it is worth the time and trouble. Are you going to help everyone? No. To many people ask questions just wanting someone to say..you are so right, I agree with you, you are doing the right thing. Those people really don't want help to begin with.
At your age you do need to get out and do other things though. You can get burnt out quickly if you are here all the time. And very frustrated too!
Religion is a help in many peoples lives. I personally think that like all things it can be
overdone. I don't talk about religion much because
I feel each person has their own beliefs and things that get them through each day. Whatever they are I approve. :)
I think if you started liking yourself others would like you too. You are still a kid, act like one now and then :). Don't take everything so serious, have fun. If the depression get unbearable then tell your parents you need help. If they don't listen find someone who will.
I do think you need to talk to your mom too and let her know how you feel. Work should come 2nd in her life behind her family. Some parents will never realize that of course. I hope yours will once she is made aware that you need her in your life.
Good luck. :)
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