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social anxiety
Sorry, this may be a bit long...
I have a non-severe (or I don't think it's severe) case of social anxiety. I'm 13/f and I've always been very shy...I'm not the people type and I don't really like talking and dealing with people too much. I don't like going places by myself and I don't like picking up the phone OR drawing attention to myself. Usually I have some one go with me all the time to places and talk to people for me, and everyone is starting to get annoyed with the fact that I always need them for simple things. My mom recently got me a book about it and I don't like it AT ALL because I don't understand it...so now she wants me to go to a counselor!!!! I DON'T want to go to any shrink whatsoever because I don't think that will help...I've been to a councelor before about something else and I HATED IT because I hate being talked to in that "shrink" way. I'm refusing to go but she says I have to if I want to "overcome this problem I have". I think my problem is I just don't want to embarrass myself in front of other people and I don't like being by myself because I'm terrified of being kidnapped or something like that. Just now my mom tried to talk to me about (I don't like talking about things with her because she's like a counselor and it really annoys me) it but I refused to talk and now I'm really upset because she's mad at me. Should I really go to a counselor? Maybe I should get another book? I want to avoid the counselor at all costs...maybe I should just have an open talk about it with my mom and tell her those real reasons why i'm so anti-social? HELP!
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I know just how you feel, I'm alot like you. I'm really shy and very nervous and uncomfortable when going to new places and being around a bunch of new people, etc.
But I definately think you should have a sit-down with your mom and just open up about everything. If she could understand your reasons, she would probably be less apt to push you towards going to a counselor. Maybe it's something she can help you with instead.
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First, you should sit your mom down and tell her you just want to talk and let her know everything you are feeling. You might be able to figure some things out with her. I used to be the same way as you (and still am in some ways) and you just have to put yourself out of that comfort zone you have and then you realize half the things you are afraid of are really not that bad. And, hey, it wouldn't hurt at least trying the counselor. If you go to a good teen counselor she/he may really be able to understand you and help you have confidence to be less shy. If you try the counselor and decide it's not helping, you can easily just stop going. That could even be a deal to make with your mom. That you'll try, but if you don't like it she has to let you stop.
I hope it all goes well . =)
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i think that you should talk to your mom about the way that you feel. like. i'm the same way. maybe, you could write you're mom a letter. maybe that will help more. you're obviously very good at putting how you feel about this into writing. hope i helped. xoxo. and the best of luck
*muaz*
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I think you should talk to your mom about the real reasons your scared to be by yourself. Moms can def. help..really. You should also try getting another book..it might help! Now..couselor's aren't bad at all! I mean they are kinda annoying how they always ask you questions..but it helps. You should atleast compromise with your mom..say you'll try like a month with the counselor..if you think it helps then keep going to it. And NO ONE wants to get embarresed infront of people! But chances are your not going to! You can learn to be social by just saying what your really thinking..i mean if you can write it down you can say it..right?
Hope i helped!! Ask me if you have more advice!
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I understand why you wouldn't want to see a counselor, especially because you dont like talking to people about stuff like this. So I personally think that you should tell your mom exactly what you wrote here, she would understand your situation better. Counselors wouldnt be the best idea for you because you dont like talking to people much so I think you should avoid going to one unless you feel comfortable.
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