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how do i get rid of the overprotectiveness?
my boyfriend & i have been dating for almost 6 months. we love & respect each other very much. the furthest we've been is 1st, & we don't even do that anymore. i try my best to respect my parent's wishes which consisted of hugs, cuddling, & an occasional kiss. lately it seems like they're becoming more & more overprotective with this rule. my boyfriend came over last night & i had a stomachache & didn't feel good. so, he put a pillow on his chest/stomach area & let me lie on it. he spread his legs out so i could lie down while he sat down comfortably. our "private parts" weren't touching indirectly, because i know my dad doesn't like that. he was rubbing my tummy to try to make me feel better. no one told us to stop so i thought they didn't mind it. then i overrheard them talking about it today & how disgusting it was. how my "private parts" are above & below my tummy so he should never touch there. so then i told my parents later on i wouldn't do that but i just feel bad that they keep assigning random rules left & right & i feel like a bad person, because i do. my boyfriend is hurt everytime i tell him we can't do something because my parents don't approve of it, but they always feel uncomfortable telling us that. he feels like they don't trust us. & i feel the same way. why don't they? we don't do anything majorly wrong. i'm trying so hard to gain their trust. when we're alone, we do the same as when we're around them. i don't want to do nothing around them & then do more with him when we're alone [nothing past a peck] because i feel weird about that. like i'm sneaking or something. someone please help me fix all of this. i've talked to them about it many times but they just don't listen. they say they're too old fashioned. but they're really hurting my relationship with my boyfriend. we have a lot of love & sometimes we want to show it physically, but just with a hug & an occasional kiss. they're married & have sex, so why can't they understand that? ugh i can't take it anymore. thanks if you can help.
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I think that maybe you should talk to thm and say how you feel that you can't gain the trust that you deserve from them and that yo are really hurting. I mean if your parents are that much over-protective then you might not even be able to like kiss or something then your boyfrend might dump you because you can't do nothing more than a kiss to him and I think he knows that he can not gain their trut either. I don't think you can get rid of overprotectivness I just think that you can help the situation by asking them to trust you and that you won't let them down if they give you a chance. Maybe they aren't overprotective maybe they are just doing it for your own good. But my first suggestion is to ask them why they don't trust you and say that it really hurts your feelings. GooD LucK!!
<3 Alli
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Hi, you should just ask your parents why they don't like you kissing and stuff like that. Tell them that you promise that you won't have sex and that but please tell them that your a teenager and you want to experience having a boyfriend and that. Really if they can't except that then it's their problem. Daniel.
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Well find a way to know they can trust you...my parents do the same thing they are just protecting you...they dont want you to do anything you will regret. Tell your boyfriend that they just want to protect both of you because his parents might feel the same way they dont want him to do anything he will regret and if something happens you cant change it so dont complain because you will thank your parents one day!!!
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well for one how old are you, if your like 14 or older then its completely like normal to want to do more than just that. Parents are always strict, but if your young it might be good. Its really cute that you guys only do that much when you've been goin out that long, its a good sign. Showing that you guys love each other because of who you are instead of what you can do. Now dont feel guilty if you guys do more, my parents were really strict about all that stuff to. But i went behind there backs and did it anyways. Yeah at first a felt guilty but honestly its between you and your boyfreind not you him and your parents. If you guys are goin to do something make sure your both comfortable and agree with it. Make sure you are completely alone, like i wouldnt do it if the parents are home. Mean while around your parents only do what you would normally do. They just care about you and dont want you to get hurt or maybe even eventualy pregnant. Trust me, almost everyones parents are like that. Just do what you guys wanna do, comfortably! I hopee i helped and good luck! =)
Well since you guys are that age and youve been together that long i think it would def. be fine to start taking things more physical. Since your parents are like always home or around you, maybe you are allowed to go to his house? if not then maybe you should try talkin to your parents...haha or be a badass and hang out with him behind there backs somewhere else. Just remember though, there's no reason for regret.. all parents are lilke that, but they should know you're growin up and you found somenoe who you can REALLLYY TRUST. Thats so cute just everything about you two how you were best friends before, i just got outta a relationship like thatt. lol but yeahh really i wish you the best of luck and hope things go well for you to!=)
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its completely normal for parents to be overprotective when it comes to their daughters' relationships. especially in todays world, alot can happen if theyre not cautious. im sure your boyfriend wouldn't try to harm you in any way, but as the people who were put on this earth to protect and love you it might take your parents a bit longer to understand that. One thing though, how old are you? maybe they feel that you and your boyfriend(especially your boyfriend) aren't mature enough to respect their wishes so they constantly make more boundries. as for trust, i doubt it's you they have a problem with. In modern times men have had much more of a tendency to harm their female partners than the other way around. I bet you theyre taking that into account. My advice: try talking to them again, but come from a different angle. Let them know that you love them and that you know they love you and that theyre only trying to protect you from any possibility of something happening. How well do they know your boyfriend? maybe getting to know him better can ensure them he wont hurt you. The first few years of dating are both hard on the parent and the child. In time things will get better. If they dont listen now, dont ever stop being trustworthy, and dont ever stop trying. Take care, and good luck! i hope i helped =]
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