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I dont want to leave! its so much pressure for me now!
okay. there is this school that i am going to for my 10th grade year and i want to go to this school and then i dont. i have known my whole class scince pre-K and now everyone has a great bond with oneanother. i want to graduate with my class and i have made a huge friendship and here is this thing. i am so sad about leaving my crush. i know i shouldnt worry about a boy for this but this year i had this gut feeling that he liked me as well and i was afraid to ask him and im still afraid to call and ask him if he liked me and if he did i would really like to go out with him. he flirted with me so much at all these partiies and he did it infront of his g-friend and didnt care. they broke up like the next day. anyways its one of the top schools in the country and i got in and my parents want me to go and im really scared to leave. each time i think about it i just cry. i have had so much fun with my grade and NOW i have to leave them. i have told my parents how i feel but they say they want me to have this oppurtunity. my mom told me she would still keep me invloved and stuff but it just wont be the same. im just so confused becuase 1 its alot better than my other school 2 it hAS and excellent cirriculum and 3 it offers alot. my question is what i should do. my parents keep telling me that i dont have to do this but they really want me to. and if i do decide to go i would really like to call my crush. i just have this big felling that i was right and still do. how would i do that? i dont know what to do. and its so much pressure and my parents keep telling me they understand but i feel like they dont. what do you think i should do. im not quite sure anymore cuz at first i was so freaked out and thought it was so cool but now im not so sure i want to go anymore. im so confused right now and i cant get it out of my head. so can someone help me. i need real advice. its funny im always giving advice on this site and this is my first question asking. so please help me!!
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I'm 22, and my biggest regret from high school was that at precisely sophomore year, I decided doing things with my friends and dating were more important than my GPA and my future. I didn't have the option of going to a great school, like you, but still, loads of opportunities were thrown my way that I simply blew off because I kept thinking, I'm 16, you know, I don't want to miss this game, that party, or the possibility of seeing this guy at this particular event...I stressed because I always thought I was missing out on something fun. Junior year, everyone I'd gone to school with since kindergarten began to hate each other and seperated off into what seemed like smaller and smaller groups until senior year, and then we all just sort of floated around the halls with senioritis, doing our own thing. I would've felt the same way you do now, not wanting to leave them, but the truth is- after you graduate, they're gone anyway. Some are able to keep friendships between 2 or 3 people, it is possible, but not typical. Point is, you'll have to leave them eventually, why not now? At least that way you won't have to see them at each other's throats junior year and be wondering what the hells happened to everybody. You'll make friends at this new school (everyone wants to know the new girl), you'll have a clean slate, and I'm sure there will be plenty of guys there and *bonus*- they could be more intelligent, or at least be more on top of their lives and what they want to do with them. Thats pre-judgement, yes, but I'd always wondered what it would be like to go to a really great school with an excellent curriculum. All we had was the bare minimum to get by, everything else was sports. All we had to offer in the guy department were big, steroid given bodies with meat for heads. Meatheads, you see.
So you were excited about the new school at first, but now that you've gotten the chance you're not sure. Sounds like you're just scared. Change can be scary. But its natural. You'll have experiences similiar to your first day at new school for the rest of your life- first day at a new job, etc. So go ahead and throw yourself in there, get used to it. Push yourself to be better and not let fear take this opportunity away from you. You know you'll be glad when you're 22.
As far as your crush goes, if you stay, of course, and you were right about his feelings, you'll be able to see him whenever and it could be great. If you go, I'd let him go as well. Its hard to chaulk something up to what might've been, but it would seem kinda neive to get into a somewhat long distance relationship with a guy who openly flirts with other girls in front of his girl-friend. If you two were to make it exclusive, just think what he might do, when you're not there to catch him. I mean, would it bother you, not being able to see him a lot and knowing that he's a flirt? Maybe one of your old girlfriends could keep an eye on him for you! Sounds like a not-so-ideal way to have a relationship, and probably once you're around all those new guys for awhile, you'll want to drop him as soon as possible, anyway.
With all this said: I absoloutely think that you should chainsaw whats tying you down to your old school and beat up whichever good, old, friends are begging you not to go(aka,holding you back)- just kidding, assure them you can keep in touch, and get a better education. If given the choice, ALWAYS choose a better education. Don't settle now for friends and boys who are probably only going to be around for approximately 3 and half more years of your life. Hope this turns out to be an easy decision for you!
Peace,
Shade
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i understand where both you and your parents are coming from. they only want the best for your future and i doubt theyre truly pressuring you as much as it feels. if anything you're probably putting some pressure on yourself because you can't make a decision. as for your grade, if you're truly friends it won't matter where you go to school. theyll still love you and you could always hang out after school. as for that guy, theres going to be plenty out there. but if you want to go for him just do it! get yourself out there and take a chance. if he likes you back it also shouldnt matter whether you go to a different school. im not saying you should go, and im not saying you shouldnt, im only trying to make the first option less scary so you can decide what you really want to do. good luck, i hope i helped =]
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hey,
I read your problem and i understand how much pressure your in, and i am really sorry that your parents are practically forcing you into doing this. And i have heard about his situation alot, about how people like their school so much and they love their friends, and they have crushes,...etc. and then something happens and they have to leave their school. so they keep on crying and feel really bad about it. And honestly, in such situations,there can't be anything done to try and make it feel the same, but there are things that can be done to say in touch with your school. Number 1, you can still go out with your friends and call them and tell them about your new school. Number 2, you can call that guy and ask him out and hang out with him at anytime,and i am sure that he'll agree because you sound like a really great person who really loves her school and friends and all.
Other than that, maybe this new school is really a great oppurtunity and you can meet new people and start a new life, and give people any impression you want. Actually, its really nice to be going to a whole new place and to start over again. So you know, there is always a bright side to everything, and thats what you have to think about , because thats what would encourage you and make you feel better.
Finally, if there are any further concerns or questions, be free to contact me.
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