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help
my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and my sister and my 4 year old niece and 2 year old nephew moved in becouse they got kicked out becouse they couldn't pay the rent in their apartment and now I have to share a room with 3 people 4 people counting me I ended up sleeping on the couch and they got my room which I don't think is fair at all and we only have 1 bathroom so I have no privacy and I think at 17 I need all the privacy that I can get what should I do?
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Families?
well just stick it out you will be repayed for your valiant efforts plus families are supposed to stick together just hang in there with a smile on your face somebody appreciates it
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Well, maybe you could convince your mom to move you into a vacant room, or one with few people sleeping in it.
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I shared a bedroom with two other girls when I was seventeen, one girl was twelve and the other was six. It wasn't always fun but we made it work. One of the compromises that we made was that I got the room all to myself for an hour and a half after dinner each day, so I could call my friends, do homework, write in my diary or just listen to music in peace. If possible try to negotiate something similar. You'll be shocked how much calmer and happier you are if you just get an hour or so to yourself each day.
I agree with you that it isn't very fair you've been kicked out of your own bed. But just because something isn't fair doesn't mean it's not necessary. Toddlers really can't sleep on a couch safely, but a seventeen-year old can. However, if you are going to keep sleeping on the couch I think you'd be completely right to ask your parents to hang up a thick curtain across that side of the room so you have some privacy when you sleep, and let you make yourself comfortable with your own pillow and beddings and some of your own stuff, posters, cd player or such, around you.
All of these things, the time alone, the curtain for privacy and anything else you can think of that will help make you more comfortable are things you should be able to discuss calmly with your parents and big sister. Don't scream or yell or make demands or talk about the things you think you have a 'right' too. Discuss the fact you are getting frustrated because you don't have any alone time and tell them the ideas you have that could make you less cranky and more pleasant to be around.
But honestly dear, you don't NEED privacy. Privacy makes life better and more enjoyable but you don't NEED it the way that your sister and her children NEED a place to live right now. What they are going through is awful and you are an absolute saint for opening up your life and home to them and I'm certainly not saying that they shouldn't be trying to make this easier for you, but when you talk them about this situation try to remember that these people are your family, that you love each other and that everyone is having a tough time right now.
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I would explain to them that you are glad to share your room but this is your house too and you need to be where you are comfortable and that you are not meaning to offend them in anyway.
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