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I have a best friend whom I've known since the 7th grade, and one of the things we promised each other in our ring of friends is that "Friends come first always before boyfriends." However, I feel that this best friend of mine is not keeping this promise. Besides being close friends with me, she also had this really close guy-friend since the 7th grade, who has now become her boyfriend. I know that I should understand that its okay for her to be closer to him because they were close before, and are now in a relationship together, but I feel hurt that its against what we promised... Like, she would always, always stress it to to us that friends are always first, but this now seems hypocritical... We rarely talk on the phone anymore, or talk at all because she's always spending time with her boyfriend... What can I do to repair this friendship, or to understand???
Thank you very much. (16/f - Junior)
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
she probally doesnt realize it
talk to her about it
if that doesnt work
try and get your other friends to talk to her about it.
if she is happy, dont diss the boy.
Just say "hey <insert name here> we should hang out this weekend" if she has plans say "i really miss you, we never hang out anymore, and i was really hoping we could hang out soon"
as long as you arent a brat about it, everything should work out.
Good luck! :)
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Well i think you should talk to ur friend and tell her that you guys made a promise when you guys were in 7th grade and she isnt going along with it. Tell her that you want tl hang out with her and like a girls night out something where no guys can come. Hope i helped
-Sharifa
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well if she doesn't keep her promise you shouldn't keep your promise either. If you think that she betrated you guys then all of you should get boyfriends to because me and my friends made that path. Everytime I have a boyfriend i still hang out with my friends becasue he wants to know them because their like sisters to me. Anyway get a boyfriend.
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People are going to say what they want and of course people are going to change whether they want to or not. This happened with my best friend and my boyfriend. We made the same promise. But as soon as she got a boyfriend she dicked me over so bad, he treated me like shit, and I hated him. After they broke up, I got a boyfriend. She got mad at me for always being with him when she did the same thing.
Where am I going with all of this?
-1. She thinks her boyfriend treats her better than you do.
-2. She is just growing up.
or -3. She doesn't mean to hurt you.
I would talk to her about this. I mean, she should atleast have time to call you. But think of it this way, when you get a boyfriend that you really like, are you going to not hang out with him as often as you like because of a promise you made in seventh grade?
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When you make promises when your younger, things change. I'm sure if you really liked this guy and he asked you out, you wouldnt let a pesky promise you made in 7th grade, keep you from love, would you? Things just change a lot, she could be saying all that stuff about friends first, but that was before she realized how good it feels to be in a relationship. Its hard to understand when you're not..
Okay, wel its not bad that shes hanging out with her boyfriend a lot, she cant be hangingout with him 24/7 though, so theres got ot be time you can call her. You can tell heryou want to hang out with her, and you can drop the whole being angry about the promise that was made.
Because that seems to be the conflict here. :)
I hope thigns go better!
I really do.
<3
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Hi there, human being's can be strange creature's sometime's. When we hit puberty our interest into the other sex is alot greater than ever before. For example when people are children we play mainly with younger boys/girls our age, and find mixing with the opposite sex, disgusting or a funny matter. As we hit puberty all that seems to change. What my point is, is simply that your friend has now hit that puberty time and will probaly start to drift more to the opposite sex than there own. Boyfriends seem to be the only thing in their world that matters. Just tell her how it made you feel. Remember though, that she's growing up and so are you. But you can always be best friends. That is very valuable to have. Daniel.
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maybe you need to talk to your friend, she may not realise that she's making you feel this way. also make sure you stay open-minded, your friend might find herself in a similar situation as you may start hanging out with a boyf soon.
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